Patient Modesty: Volume 3
SINCE MAY 14 2008, NONE OF THE COMMENTS SUBMITTED AND APPROVED BY ME FOR POSTING HAVE ACTUALLY BEEN POSTED ON THE COMMENT PAGE OF "PATIENT MODESTY VOLUME 2". AGAIN, THIS APPEARS TO BE A QUIRK OF THE BLOGGER.COM SYSTEM. ALL THE POSTINGS CAN BE VIEWED THERE BY CLICKING ON "NEWEST" ON THE POSTING PAGE BUT NONE ARE PUBLISHED ON THE COMMENT PAGE.
I WILL CONTINUE THE DISCUSSION BY POSTING BELOW ALL THE COMMENTS THAT WERE NOT PUBLISHED IN "VOLUME 2". AS OF JUNE 26 2008 THIS THREAD WILL BE CLOSED FOR ALL COMMENTS. PLEASE GO TO "PATIENT MODESTY: VOLUME 4" TO CONTINUE COMMENTS.
JD, the porblem with your "Pyramid selling" tactic is that men are embarrassed about discussing this issue at all, whether it be with friends, family or the "so called" medical "professionals".
The deliberate conspiracy of silence which men face is not accidental. Female staff will simply ignore your request and certainly will not raise it "up the food chain" because all they care about is protecting their jobs. The comfort of male patients is NOT an issue, we are compliant and quiet, what more could they want?
They rely on the embarrassment factor to stop men "going public" with the issue, have you EVER seen this as an issue in a large circulation newspaper or news channel?
The ONLY answer is individual refusal to go along with what i feel constitutes "abuse".
Men need to start saying no and keep on saying no.
WHY is it even remotely deemed appropriate to have cystoscopy performed by females on men, let alone the issue of female "spectators".
The person who said that doctors are choosing to employ females so as to negate the need for a chaperone was absolutely right, until we men complain, it will not only stay this way, it will get worse!
Why not email your friends the URL of this site and let them see for themselves how others feel, it has certainly empowered me!
Wednesday, May 14, 2008 1:52:00 PM
Men's Restroom- Women's Restroom
Men's Lockeroom-Women's Lockeroom
Just really makes you wonder?
Wednesday, May 14, 2008 2:08:00 PM
chuck mcp you made good points but where are you deriving your figures from? 1/3, 1/3, 1/3?
I wonder if 1/3 of men care about this? I also wonder if ANY males ever apply to work in a doctors' office? Most of these positions are very low paying, so most men would probably want more compensation than what is offered as an office assistant. There is a good deal of turn-over as well.
It is odd that some "men" feel a male nurse must be gay, when most are not. I wonder if women should assume that the female nurse working on them is a lesbian? Then, following suit, women patients should request and prefer male nurses.
It is also being stated here on this site that women in general have no understanding of how men feel to have opposite gender care. Maybe many nurses don't have any compassion for this issue but I do think many wives would MUCH prefer their husbands be cared for by males when it comes to genital & personal care and they certainly do understand this issue.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008 5:27:00 PM
I don't like to see that word modesty. It's not an issue of
modesty. It's an issue of double
standard. Somehow that men are
less of a human being than women,
therefore we don't count!
Wednesday, May 14, 2008 10:22:00 PM
I am a 49-year-old woman who has a fresh (albeit apparently unpopular) view on the issue of gender and medical care. I cringe at the thought of another woman performing any form of exam on me. Three years back we moved to a small town in another state, and I chose a male gyne whom I had been told by many women was very reputable. It was true-- the man was purely professional during every part of the visit. However, when it came time for the pelvic exam, in came miss bouncy-happy-nurse to stand between my legs and "chaperone." When I said that I didn't want her there, the doctor explained that it was required to have a chaperone present. So I said no problem, my husband can come in and chaperone. I was then told that wasn't good enough, it had to be a female. This made NO sense to me. Who is more likely to protect a woman's best interests? The man she's been married to for 30 years? Or some stranger who works for the doctor? They suggested that could have my husband come in along with the nurse, but that would have been worse for me-- the more people in the room, the more embarrassing. In the end, I refused the exam, put on my clothes and left. I have since called every doctor within a reasonable radius of our town, and they all require that their own chaperones be present. As a result, I have not had medical care of a female nature in 3 years, nor do I intend to. I have since met a few other women in town who have the same view as mine-- one hasn't been to a gyne in 8 years!
I have heard several doctors complain about how many women they see with advanced cancer who would have been fine if they'd "just come for their yearlys." I say that those doctors can shoulder some of the blame themselves. If more doctors gave the women a choice as to EXACTLY who they were willing to have present during intimate exams, a lot fewer women would skip them.
And here is a very interesting thing. Most of the offices I called suggested that I go to a female gynecologist because they don't require chaperones at all. WHY the double standard? Have they ever heard of homosexuality? My very reason for not liking female medical staff is, when I was quite a bit younger, I overheard 2 female nurses discussing in great detail what "beautiful boobs" the woman in the room next to mine had. It made me sick. People have to wake up and realize that this is a new day and age, and just having people have same-sex medical staff isn't going to fix everything, and may even make things worse (think about it-- if a doctor *did* do something untoward to you, would it be easier to live with if they were the same sex as you?) For me, the answer is no, and this is why I prefer male doctors.
But I know many people feel differently. I have 3 daughters, and from the time they were old enough to understand the question, I always asked if they wanted to go to a girl doctor or a boy. Two of them now go to females, one goes to a male. It's a very personal choice, and one that should be given to every patient of any age-- by the parents, and by the medical staff.
The ultimate answer is in giving the patient the right to choose who they want present at all times in all situations, be it during tests, exams or surgeries.
As for the modesty issue, why can't the doctor simply inform the patient exactly what needs to be done and let them (the patient) set the standards regarding their own modesty? Some people are more embarrassed wearing flimsy gowns than being nude. Others need to be as clothed as possible at all times. We're all wired differently, so the medical profession needs to stop trying to find a golden "standard" to treat everyone by.
Thursday, May 22, 2008 11:19:00 PM
AS OF JUNE 26 2008 THIS THREAD WILL BE CLOSED FOR ALL COMMENTS. PLEASE GO TO "PATIENT MODESTY: VOLUME 4" TO CONTINUE COMMENTS.