Preserving Patient Dignity (Formally Patient Modesty) Volume 130
What have you been reading, hearing or TV viewing that has provoked some feelings of comfort or concern about what is happening in the world of medicine, medical care, treatment or science? Ethics is all about doing the right thing. Are you aware of any issues in medicine or biologic science which are being done right, could be improved or in fact represent totally unethical behavior? Write about them here.. and I will too! ..Maurice (DoktorMo@aol.com)
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182 Comments:
Welcome to Volume 130 and as you may have seen as the Introduction to this Volume, I think the role of Artificial Intelligence (AI) is of worthy consideration.
IF THE PRESERVATION OF PATIENT DIGNITY MEANS THE PRESERVATION OF THE INTRINSTIC POWERS PERMITTED FOR EACH AND EVERY PATIENT, THE QUESTION
IN THIS ERA OF MEDICAL CARE AND INTERACTIONS IS WHAT ROLE WILL FURTHER DEVELOPMENT OF ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE (AI) MEAN TO THE DIGNITY OF EACH AND EVERY PATIENT.
Or is AI a transient and even trivial issue for any thorough consideration? ..Maurice
Has anyone tried taking advise from any of the nurses on Quora ( the good ones that is)? One male nurse says foleys arent needed for lapascopic surgeries IF you pee prior to and get a bladder scan to make sure you are empty. This is NEVER offered to patients. If you can get through the bullshit responses from many there are some things patients can do and should be accommodated for.
Otherwise, if you cant beat them join them. I know i am going to lie through my teeth the next time hubby needs surgery. When we ask about pre op/post op and observing at minimum until the incision and waking up in OR going to recovery. I was going through an internship for scrub tech until i injured my back and standing for long periods became a problem. Sights, sounds and smells dont bother me. YOU being unethical bothers me. Lol. Cat
Cat,
One of the most important lessons I learned from the medical community is to lie. We lie in telling them he takes the prescription they prescribe as we get it filled and flush it. He has now learned to lie about being in pain and to guard his expressions. We don't give "histories" as the only purpose they truly serve is for them to sell the info for profit for research. If lying is good enough for them (and you can read articles where they justify lying to patients), it is good enough for us. They do it because they believe they are entitled to spin and lie but our reason is self-preservation. Once you have been medically harmed, you never forget it and you what you must to protect yourself from further harm. I know there are those who will say it is wrong but then I doubt if they have been truly medically harmed.
This is TC
My knee scope went perfect because I was so proactive & it worked. I had very little to drink the day before (I fasted for 16 hours prior to the surgery) & drank nothing the day of the surgery.
Luckily, I was treated enough like an adult that they didn't require me to void my bladder before discharging me, because I'd have been kept overnight.
I didn't urinate until 12am because my only liquid consumption that day was two 12oz diet sodas I downed at 10pm -- 9 hours after surgery. . I guess I went into surgery nearly dehydrated & the IV drip was just absorbed in my body. No big deal to mollycoddle me about.
My prior inquiries about surgery catheterization is the golden standard is four hours or more required catheterization , but 4 hours or less not. Anyone saying that any short surgery requires a Foley is lying, go somewhere else! )Nurses thrive in the power trip of shoving stuff up utethas & butts, so I would take this up with the surgeon. His coordinator, the surgery center, etc.
Quora haswss of a readership with an Authoritarian folowers Personality. (Those insisting experts are always right & we shouldn't question them My posts aremt trolled there. & I got a lot of encouragement to stand up for my rights as I refused students & chaperones in my inguinal pain treatment.
I had a phone visit with my Lutheran Social Services therapist who promised to help me get a lawyer, but she only referred to legal aid in San Bernardino county. It's inert! They only exist on paper. CA Disability Rights is the service that helps fere, but they turned me down as a client.
This time, I am trying to get legal help to preemptively intimidate facilities (legally) to dismiss chaperones.
My therapist might write a "reasonable accomodations letter" for CPTSD, saying unecessary exposure will exacerbate my suicidal mental state (no hyperbole there) & try to proceed with the facility afraid to violate ADA requirements. Yet, I'm sure that a facilities "right" to use chaperones supercedes my rights as an abused survivor.
Lastly. On 01/04/23 I had my first spinal exam with a PA at a chain pain clinic in Rancho Mirage. The orthopedic PA asked me to touch my toes, but then immediately & aggressively inserted his hand into the back of my elastic banded shorts & violently pulled up -- giving me a wedgie. Why? Obviously because he didn't want me to touch my toes & was assisting me internally. Even at age 66, I could touch by hands in the floor & the gesture wasn't appreciated. On the way home I redlined my engine at over 7500 rpm & got a rod knock.
My appointment with that Siberian physician is at another city"s outlet of the same pain chain clinics. I'd write a complaint about the orthopedic PA, but it would only bolster their assertion that a chaperone is necessary for my upcoming appointment with the Siberian bleached blond (phoney Botox lips & huge silicone boobs to match)
TC
Outside of this group I have often been accused of slanderously "sexualizing" the medical profession, but it was still in my grandparents lifetime (not that long ago) when doctors were attributing any & all conditions with female hysteria & treating it with ftgeir ingers, dildos & vibrators. (They & their husbands went along).
And of course, mandatory enemas for EVERYONE staying overnight in a hospital, even for observation -- antiquated, having no Reasonable medical basis (except for the most constipated or for bowel prep) which only incriminates the profession more, for it's morbid obsession with other people's privates
Not done now, showing it's absolute lack of necessity.
We know about OR recovery UIEs as being rape & I brought up the use of juvenile delinquents as medical "volunteers" at the threat of a guards strap.
Other stuff in recent medical history besides hysteria treatment I don't know about that I an use as a club against them in convincing others of providers' drive to power in crossing sexual & decency boundaries from an historical standpoint?
TC again, sorry I forgot to identify myself at the bottom of my historical medical sex abuse inquiry, but I think I did at the top. (If so, please delete this Dr B) thanks
TC
Dr. Bernstein, I imagine that AI will be helpful with unusual cases where AI's ability to quickly sift through vast amounts of data can help inform the physician but I don't see it replacing the physician's intuition and experience.
As for patient privacy and dignity, unless AI-powered robots can somehow replace chaperone observers or perform certain assessments or procedures, I'm not seeing how AI can address any of the issues discussed here. Were AI robots able to replace chaperones, it seems that healthcare practices would have to establish standard protocols that the AI device was programmed to expect to observe. I doubt the healthcare system would tolerate each staff member not being able to decide for themselves what constitutes necessary exposure.
Has anyone seen the article that came out this week in Medpage today Bad surgeon: barriers to addressing medical misconduct? I found it encouraging that a doctor would speak out on issues that the medical community avoids or actively try’s to hide. The price that the caring ones pay explains the reluctance to follow the adage if you see something say something. I take it as another crack in their armor
Sorry that was Jeff about the cracked armor
Dr. Bernstein,
I reviewed blogs 127 and 128 and seemed to find multiple entries penned by JF.
I haven't had any "experiences" with the medical profession lately but was dismayed to hear how an elderly relative was treated recently. He related that instead of getting a urinal or bedpan, the staff simply placed patients in diapers. Staff was not terribly responsive and patients were expected to urinate and defecate in the diapers and that eventually someone would clean them up. He indicated that there was no concern for his exposure and he was "changed" in full view of the hallway because the door wasn't even closed. I can understand the need for diapers when the patient is too weak or incapacitated to use a urinal or bedpan, but it seems that it was done more out of convenience for the staff. Of course, I would rather help someone to the restroom rather than clean soiled diapers. I am not looking forward to aging.
EM
TC here again
Well besides masterbation as a panacea for female hysteria in my grandparents lifetime, Dr Linda Hazard held captive and SLOWLY STARVED TO DEATH 24 patients in her Seattle facility, with no escape -- while the licensing board & her medical peers allowed to happen. It speaks volumes more about our society than Hazard. , it's the Authoritarian Personality follower mindset that puts position, degrees, eduction, & titles above humanity & common sense.
This is INSANE, EXTREME sex abuse, & unfettered medical arrogance, & how can we not pstull feel vestiges of that permeated in present practices?
TC
TC
I'm sick of hearing "one bad apple" when that bad apple's actions are sanctioned by its peers
TC
TC:
I'm infuriated! All of my Medicare electronic statements read "Moderate level to make my own medical decisions"
I called Medicare & they disavowed it, pointing to my providers -- but they wouldn't all make that assessment.
Medicare is vaguely pointing the finger at my PCP, & if this is the case then I'm through with her, & through with all health providership .
This assessment is made not by any dementia or Alzheimer's test, no IQ test no MMRPI, it's pretty ducking random.
A colossal slap in the face given all the medical neglect, medical abuse, Unconsented surgical scars to my left inguinal area & left Ist metatarsal The time urologists (1995) wanted to remove my right testical for a cancer biopsy, the left had a hydrocele & the cheap county medical program tried to convince me to remove that for cancer biopsy
All this FUCKING shit I've documented here including sexual misconduct, & I (the victim) am the one whose cognitive medical decisions skills are put to question?
I AM cantankerous & am furious as an abused patient, but whomever is responsible for that stigmstizimg mischaracteristic is going to get a HELL of a confrontation.
I did attempt suicide (05/31/24) because I was being kicked off a property with no comparable place to put my trailer. The has a 5150 & refused to authorize payment, but this assholes hit paid anyway, & I'm not in anyway grateful to have my life saved & be catheterized. Living in $1100 minimum SSI is a death sentence, a quality of life matter separate from ones critical thinking skills. (Anyone here objecting to suicide? Don't do it then, same as if you don't believe in abortion don't have one.?)
I'll be frank. I am inmuned to the socioreligious brainwashing that somehow motivates others to put up with any & all adversity. I'm not fooled. I have no intention of living long enough to be taken out by some natural cause. It will be by my own hand on my terms when the day comes.
But 5150 aside, & maybe the reason, I am vehement about this arbitrary mental assessment.
Sorry, but even Dr B has alluded to my high level of lucidity -- even though my values differ from most. My decisions are clear. .
Ventilation of the writer's experiences and yet to occur anticipated experiences as exemplified by TC and others in the past, I think is a worthy therapeutic value of blogs such as this one. ..Maurice.
Yes, I would say avoidamce of catheterization alone is reason for suicide.
My first catheterization 12/22/20 had am ER team that included a flamingly bitchy, effeminate male nurse. I came to & heard them tell me that they were going to put a tube down my throatSemi-conscious, felt obligated to tell them I had Sjigerns (dry mouth) & said, "I've got, I've got, I've got..,unable to access Shogerns from my memory the hat nurse interjects, " did you ever hear the story of the boy who cried wolf"?
Eyes closed but with increasing auditory & tactile level Fully a that my privates had been exposed & worked in, I declared "I didn't want to be naked !" The gayass bastard goes, " you're not naked you're wearing a gown! "
Then the unspeakable! I verlt a hard plastic catheter that must have been 1/2".thick, my worst fear, & as an act of contempt I willfully tanned it out, _ it hurt!
The last words I heard was the gayaas piece of shit yelling "HE PULLED IT OUT!"
I awake 4 days later 12/26/20 at about 2pm, quartered restrained to the bed. An Asian ER doc asked me if there were any sleeping meds involved besides the carbon monoxide & I lied & he asked me if I wanted to go home that day. Yay! No 5150, & meant that my friend/landlord owed up to making my living situation impossible. It WAS externally driven. I was too weak, & asked to go the next day.
.Then the flamingly effeminate nurse came just to check my privates. I had a bad urinary tract unfectiin. He undiapered me and contemptuously washed my privates, saying it's sooo gross (the so with an ostentatious lisp!) I connected his face to his ER room voice. He had dirty blond/light brown hair that was receding. & A moustache.
From that point on, one extremely dark skinned Asian nurse was assigned me. She sat in the chair watching TV, and opening up my diaper to scrub me every hour. Turning ne around looking fur stool (no drool, no food). She fed me awful bullshit. I had to be on my best behavior because I'd go straight home.
They never unrestrained me , never took out the catheter for two more days. The nurse spoke little English, ignored my screams of pain that my right testicle was chronically inflamed from a hydrocele.
The San Bernardino county Department of Public Health investigated, my word against there's, so unsubstantiated. It did seem incongruous that they offer to let me go but kept me restrained in that one position (my back hurt so much!)
Because of that, they carefully reviewed the records & write the hospital up for not checking the restraints. They said it was a significant write up, nit just a slap in the wrist.
Still, no lawyer to take NIED & malpractice suits pro Bono.
Yeah,, If rather die than ve cateteruzed, no hyperbole. But catheterized by that .., guy?
I don't understand all this hoopka about sane gender medical teams, you all should never that filthy immoral piece of shit.
I could never even get his name they were so guarded _ dismissive after the fact.
But it's not my mental deficiency that SAI payments aren enough to live in. That was a toxic rental situation from which I couldn't extricate myself. My landlord ended up in hinging 02/16)21 from the gang banger he let on the property, & by 05/28/21 my car was stolen by then as I had to deal with them Al be.
Last year's suicide was because SB County Land Use Code Enforcement told my landlady that I had to leave the property by 06/01/23. The Joshua Trecarea has been ruined by Airbnb rentals , so I left on a stretcher with asysrikuc BP of 30. No ICU, they kept me in the ER, & shipped me out for a 5150 that was short, nit too unpleasant. No strip search, I was in the senior ward & we watched old movies until I was released after 96 hours.
Then I had an agonizing summer living in my car until 08/19)23. The leg edema was incredible, & walking in an ailing stiff left leg badly exaceebated the meniscus tear
But I'm very adamant about limiting my dependence on donctors, .one way or another
TC
Continuing on a bit more on the topic of AI (artificial intelligence) and the role it may play in preservation of the dignity of patients here is the link to the current article.
https://nam.edu/artificial-intelligence-in-health-health-care-and-biomedical-science-an-ai-code-of-conduct-principles-and-commitments-discussion-draft
Here is the conclusion commentary:
After decades of progress toward a data-driven health system, advanced AI methods and systems present a new and important opportunity to achieve the vision of a learning health system. These adaptive technologies also present risks, particularly when applied in a complex system, and therefore must be carefully and collectively managed. Based on a bounded review of the literature and guidance on responsible AI in health and health care, informed by ongoing dialogue with national thought leaders, and mapped to the principles of the continuously learning health system, this paper proposes a harmonized draft AI Code of Conduct framework. The Code Principles and the proposed Code Commitments reflect simple guideposts to guide and gauge behavior in a complex system and provide a starting point for real-time decision making and detailed implementation plans to promote the responsible use of AI. Engagement of all key stakeholders in the co-creation of this Code of Conduct framework is essential to ensure the intentional design of the future of AI-enabled health, health care, and biomedical science that advances the vision of health and well-being for all.
..Maurice.
p.s.-Again you all may feel that AI is not a topic of importance relative to the issues of our blog thread here.
Dr. Bernstein, an AI Code of Conduct sounds great but in the end it will come down to who is using it for what purpose.
If AI is just used to sift through data points so as to help the physician come to a diagnosis or treatment plan, it'll probably be of benefit. If it is used by the MBA's in the corporate quite to maximize profit via either withholding treatment from those them deem less desireable as patients or to push patients to more expensive or unnecessary treatment, then heaven help those of us who they choose as their victims.
You're right, not interesting, not "tangible". Too me, this is a very abstract "Futurama"matter, & I don't understand its essence or impact in a medical setting, as I wasn't brought up in the digital computer/video game era. But in my interactions I keep things simple, & on track -- my ahenda, after studying up.
Certainly won't hurt me interactions with my PCP, I set my own health agenda, set my own limits intelligibly, & she agrees.
Surgical settings? Maybe robotics can more skillfully do surgery or aspects, with less embarrassment to the patient. Again, for me choice making is always simple. I have about ten herniated discs, & they are going to have to be operated on by an endoscopic device. Open surgery I'll never agree to, I'll die first.
It's simple, & AI isn't going to be a problem until it impedes me, then it will become tangible & probably not in my lifetime.
TC
TC to Cat.
I indirectly addressed to you the issue of surgical catheterization & my understanding is that it's strictly up to the length of the surgery.
I believe the matter is best addressed by your hubby speaking directly to the surgeon by saying, "you are not going to catheterize me!" If the surgeon fired back with a rationolation , it may not be just a rationization, there may be some ligitimacy there, so study up on the specifics of his counterargument, then come back & debunk it or accept it.
If your insurance allows it, find a surgeon who's less zealous elsewhere. Your hubby will be better informed at that consultation & then he can raise his voice, slam his fist in the table, & say "I'm having this surgery & YOU'RE NOT CATGETERIZING ME!" Make him a little afraid. Intimidation is a quicker, more proactive tactic than " writing to the joint commission" or ororganizing protests that can only take place after your medical services are teminated
Im less of an expert than that make nurse, but he seems full of shit! (My bullshit meter is better calibrated than anyone's). I think he's postering as an authority figure , your inquire threatens the gratification of subjecting & humiliating patients. Not only that, but the homosexual make nurses, MAs etc isn't entirely just a stereotype* (always some truth behind many stereotypes) & there could be an additional sexual impetuous behind his foolish assertion that a quick laproscioic pricedure necessitates catheterization.
* I'm getting furious thinking about it. The Ear nurse that catheterized me on the evening of my 12/22/20 carbon monoxide/seeping pull suicide attempt was flaming, & totally insulting. He WAS a caracature of a stereotypical gay nurse. After I woke up 12/26/20 he came just to pay a visit & wash my infected genitals -- he goes, ITS SOOOO GROSS with a lisp. .
They never gave me his name, if they did, I'd kill him
Sorry to steer this away from AI concerns. But I do have a tangible means of addressing scribe/ chaperones who won't leave or or go behind a screen (disconcerting that screen partitiins are no longer a part of medical offices, proving that medical voyeurism is reaching new hirghtsm
My pain problem is frontal , & I can be examined standing up, & I can I sit to stand in front of the voyeuristic little bitch) & pull the elastic band down in the front while the doctor is facing both me & filthy little bitch.
It won't be so effective for the untesond guided block
* Sorry this is war!
TC made that last comment about facing away from scribes
My language is harsh, but again, this is almost immorality I'm facing . I'm clean in that I never forced anyone to dudrone while I looked.
I am asserting unapologetically again. that medical people have the mindset of correctional officers, but with higher test scores. IMO They are dogs ' not people. I wouldn't have a medical "professional" in my circle of acquaintances & I even expelled all my medical Facebook friends including my PCP.
I HATE THEM!!!
Tc
TC here, temporarily monopolizing this site because I am so pissed off.
February of 2023, when my menuscus damage was bad (10/27/22 MRIs) but not nearly so bad as the 11/29/23 MRIs after having been refused surgery & living in my car with a swollen leg.
At one small Palm Springs orthopedic that operates under a larger Desert Medical Group (running the hospital in JT where my back was tortured by restraints in one position from 12/22 to 12/28 2020. & a subdivision of Tehealth, one Ortho wanted to do a scope, acknowledge PT isn't necessary, but deferred to a staff colleague who rudely peeked at my MRI & said to without any prior dialogue, You can't benefit from a scope, & whatever the course of treatment, you'll have PT!
My meniscus tear got worse, but there's still enough articular cartilage inside the joint for gel injections to help.
Telling me first off the top of his head that I can't benefit from a scope, but invoking the use of PT next, can only imy that he has a personal agemda to bypass meniscus arthroscopy & replace it with an unnecessary but costly knee replacement (after a formal stint of PT that obviously won't help. ). Please be advised, Medicare won't authorize a pricey knee replacement w/o PT, but will authorize knee arthroscopy at the blink of an eye.
An investigation must be done cataloguing all the times he declined knee scopes, & the times he actually did them. I'm sure an MO of greed for knee replacements trumps arthroscopy. But who will look into that!
Now history is proving that greedy Ortho wrong, he does have one sympathetic assistant who tried to help me, & she claimed to escalate my complaint up the chain of command. She seemed surprised they didn't call me. Why? When a surgeon gets a complaint, the outfit that employs him goes into the "protect" mode. They ignore. When backed into a corner, the lie, & give vague rationalizations in return
She gave me this "ethics & resolution" wen site that's so bogus! It's internal, meaning I'd just complain to those hiring the negligent orthopedist tha I'm complaining about.
https://secure.ethicspoint.com/domain/media/en/gui/85730/index.html
This is a bogus site, that has a "Code of Conduct Rules" that takes you to an empty page. Calling the number takes you oversees to incoherent phone reps. Everyone keep in mind that orthopedic surgeons aren't plentiful, they actually have far more value, are more irreplaceable than any administrator. The facility will not reprimand or punish a Prima Donna. This is my point, that no one can be polktyannish about truth & justice prevailing. When the Whfix guards the chicken house.
To repeat, Hobbes showed us that people will harm us if we don't have the means to punish & inflict fear in them.
I have three major complaints regarding that Network of cars going vers, one from the ICU where I was restrained for a week, another from a terrible 10/24/22 scrotal ultrasound in which a nurse Ratchet type shanghaied me into being a teaching subject (I had time restraints & would've had to reschedule, & should have after her berating, scolding aggression. )
TC, mad as HELL!
Longtime visitors here recognize that this "Patient Modesty" from its very beginning years and years ago, personal emotional ventilation has always been a feature of this particular blog topic. ..Maurice.
TC to Dr Bernstein
I have googled the new nationwide HHS ban on UIEs & ES IST NICHT!
Only vague proposals in curtailng descrimminatiin
Where's the beef, this new law?
TC
Dr Bernstein, I directed my question to you. I can't find it.
While I'm waiting, therapy isn't making me feel less tainted & dirty for the sexual past medical humiliation & abuse. I hope to soon die & rid myself of it.
I have a June 5th appointment with a pain doctor from India. I seriously doubt any Hindu will honor modesty. Theirs is a tradition of punishing school (tuition) pupils by forcing them to stand naked at the front of the entire class; honor revenge rapes by village elders for girls whose family dishonors the chaste system )it nearly happened in 2013-2015 to the 13 & 22 year old sisters of a woman who eloped with a higher class man, when amnesty international Iintervened & convinced the central government to stop it. And of course, those wife burnings. I expect no modesty mercy from that Hindu creep.
TC
TC, I don't understand what you are requesting. Perhaps another reader here can help. See if this link provides the answer:
https://www.hhs.gov/about/news/2023/07/11/hhs-issues-proposed-rule-advance-non-discrimination-health-human-service-programs-lgbtqi-community.html Maurice.
TC answer:
That link is about LGBT Rights
This is your 04/04/24 post:
"Maurice Bernstein MDThursday, April 04, 2024 4:49:00 PM
To re-emphasize a law within the United States to prevent all parts of a patient's body being examined without the approval of the patient:
https://www.thehastingscenter.org/news/new-federal-ruling-informed-by-hastings-center-report-findings-on-intimate-exams
The U.S. law supports the concerns expressed on this blog topic and for the medical profession to do otherwise is unlawful.
Here is a section of the article:
A new ruling by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services that requires teaching hospitals to get written consent from patients before undergoing intimate medical exams was informed by findings published in the Hastings Center Report.
The findings came from the first national survey on the frequency and demographics of the practice of doing pelvic and prostate exams on patients who were not asked for consent. Based on their survey results, the Hastings Center Report authors estimated that 3.6 million U.S. residents may have received an unconsented intimate exam within the previous five years. This number may be a conservative estimate since most unconsented intimate exams are believed to occur while patients are anesthetized, without their knowledge. The practice was found to be equally prevalent among males and female patients, but it occurred nearly four times as often in Black patients as white patients.
“Ethically and legally, patients have the right not to have their bodies touched without their express prior permission unless doing so is required by a medical emergency that threatens their welfare while they are incapacitated and they are not expected to (re)gain capacity in time to give informed consent,” the authors wrote, adding that unconsented intimate exams “violate this widely recognized right.” ..Maurice."
TC: I could not find this on the web (though I didn't Google Hastings, ruling & of course patient's will be denied most surgeries until they sign away their so called " rights". I could not find how this law (in reality) is going to protect all of us from being bullied & coerced UIEs.
Dr MO, I find your false optimism as alienating as Banerings. First step is to acknowledge the enemy's upper hand & proceed realistically by avoiding teaching hospitals because they'll show no mercy. Go elsewhere! No laws protecting us.
TC
TC is correct abt HHS's new "rule" not making any difference. California has banned UIE's for almost 20 yrs but yet you have to wonder if they are still happening. In Florida, they passed banning UIEs several years back. In states like mine where it is still "legal" to rape patients, the generic consent form says medical students, reps., etc. might be involved. If you sign the consent, it is argued you gave consent. So how they are getting around explicit consent in Florida is many are using a specific gyn/uro consent form defining areas such as vaginal, pubic, breast, etc. and along with vague descriptions of medical intervention in these areas. It also states students or reps might be involved but essentially you giving permission to your doctor to decide who touches and sees these areas. This is not explicit consent but I guess because they detail what a pelvic/rectal exam might entail they think they covered their bases. However, patients will still not know who and why and if they are to be a chosen victim of medical rape. (I have a copy of one consent form used by a Florida gyn/ob office to skirt this issue.)
Even though, historically, HHS via Medicare/Medicaid sets the unofficial standards of care, they do nothing to enforce violations or even criminal activity such as the raping of patients via UIEs. Some states who have passed the bans have such low amounts set infractions (i.e. $1000) is would be laughable but it is not funny. Hospitals systems could easily bill the cost of a patient's rape into the patient's bill and have the last laugh by making the patient pay for the UIE which only benefits the student learner. I guess we are paying for the healthcare education of strangers. For every law which might be made to protect patient rights, the medical mafia and their minion lawyers will quickly go to work to find ways to circumvent it and most likely they will get away with doing so as there is no real regulatory backbone over medical issues.
As a side note, some states have only passed bills to ban unconsented for pelvic exams thus leaving it still "okay" to rape male patients via rectal exams. I guess there is still a backlash against men in this country because of all the years of inequality? I guess men of the present must pay for what men of the past did?
Again, I will say TC is right! There are no laws that actually protect patients unless there is a circumstance someone high up wants to use. Indiana has a chain of consent law that was clearly violated when my husband was medically assaulted multiple times. However, when push came to shove, AG Todd Rokita did nothing even though even Livanta said it was clear he did not consent. At least Rokita did not say like Livanta did that he should merely be glad he didn't die. For the most part, patient right laws are merely there to lure unsuspecting patient victims into having a false sense of safety/security to ward off lawsuits and criminal charges.
Well said JR
TC
Hello Everyone .
I received a questionnaire in the mail a few days ago asking me to answer a bunch of questions . One question has my attention . The question was ( Do you have personal , spiritual or cultural preferences that may affect your healthcare choices ( examples: diet preferences, gender of your health care provider or medical treatment ) . I found it strange that they would bring up gender preference . After all they are the ones that say what's the difference . We are all professionals . ( lol ) Did anyone else receive this from your insurance company ?
AL
I invite you to go on Quora at https://advocatingforachange.quora.com/ and read a post I wrote about an article I read from MedPage. The post is too long to post on here but it just struck a nerve that the medical community is more interested in protecting the right to end human life by saying a woman's right to "own her body" is being denied rather than to speak about and protect the bodily rights of all patients. This is not an anti or pro abortion piece but rather how the medical mafia is able to deflect and deny already patients of the right to own their body by forcing unnecessary nudity on patients and also not allowing patients to say who sees or touches their body.
@JR 4 human rights. Can you please give me a link to a detailed account of your husband's sexual medical assault I read the Quora link, came across Lana Foust, an abused patient that has contributed to my Quora posts. She's the one who lives in a state in which UICs are illegal, but where they denied her surgery in a teaching bg hospital for not signing away her rights to refuse them.
I commented on some poor British blokes worries about catheterization under a spinal. I had a spinal last week & in 1999 & didn't have any urinary worries.
That said, the Surgery Center in Victorville CA that redirected me to a hospital for an overnight stay (I refused) had a policy of not discharging patients who haven't yet emptied their bladder. Who knows what would've happened there if I didn't pee before closing time. I went to last week's surgery very dry, didn't need to urinate until 6 hours after (when I resumed drinking) but wasn't harassed or even asked about it. Treated with sufficient dignity.
I also want to make observations here. #1) I vented via text & email to friends & acquaintances about the knee surgery fiascos, places refusing my running shorts, places trying to hold me overnight, or redirecting me to hospitals for overnight stays. I guess those firmer friends & acquaintances had no empathy about this, & probably didn't appreciate my badmouthing medical."professionals. From the title MD, all the way down to MA, there ARE title bullies I hate them . Many "modest" patients on Quora, but it seems such a tiny minority. These former friends didn't respond to my "negatively plaintiff reactions to my knee surgery setbacks on February 7. Subsequently they failed to answer sone other more "positive" & trivial texts. they're not friends, & numbers & FB accounts now blocked . I've never been I well liked guy -- even before I learned to be assertive Very few friends. I'm Sicilian & loyal likee mafia but never get the loyalty I expect back. I can do this alone, & am resigned to the idea: "the other" is invariably my enemy anyway. It's me against the 8 billion of you.
TC
TC here. The last post to JR if I didn't sign it. (In Quora that September 19999 photo is the only one of myself with my dear Blue Fronted Amazon.
Another observation is that will not tolerate ANY open surgery iny any body part I've looked up microdisc surgery & it appears that it's not arthroscopic, & 1-2" incisions per disc.
I might need 5 thoracic & 4 - 5 lumbars done & given my death wish, the news I get in my next two spinal consults just might "make my day!"
TC
TC,
We did a national podcast several years back where he told a filtered version of his story. Here are the links: https://medicalerrorinterviews.podbean.com/e/larry-jane-part-1-profit-and-punishment-profiteering-hospitals-intersect-with-religious-bigotry/ and https://medicalerrorinterviews.podbean.com/?s=larry%20and%20jane Of course, these are merely summaries of what happened. He was medically assaulted several times as he specifically refused versed/fentanyl and their gold standard procedure. He was sexually assaulted bc we feel it was retaliation for several different reasons. He was stripped naked and left that way for about 25-30 minutes beforehand (prior to draping) but they did leave on his socks. Afterwards, he was left naked for about 50 minutes before they literally throw a gown over him which came off when they transferred him from the cart to bed with the door and curtains wide open. The CCU nurse used him to entertain others by forcing him urinate in front of them in a bedpan and showed the others in the room including IT staff (who was there bc she was too stupid maybe high to hook up monitors how to wash a grown man's penis & surrounding area like a baby. She left him exposed for no medically reason for hours and hours. Later she almost allowed him to choke on his own vomit. She then stripped the gown off him and left him exposed yet again while she rolled him from side to side to change sheets with the door/curtains opened. They kept him isolated from us for hours even though there was no reason and they knew we were there. The first hospital labeled him as a gay married man to retaliate bc he didn't want to stay at a teaching university hospital. They did this knowing the catholic hospital was involved in a lawsuit for not wanting to provide care to LGBTQ patients. He remembers the abuse and I saw part of it. It is a very long, nasty story as his MRs have literally 100s of lies in them which make them unusable. We even had tests done later at another hospital and they showed he didn't have a massive heart attack as there was absolutely no scarring or evidence of such. In fact, he aced all the heart tests to the point where they said there was no need to continue. The doctor even asked him several times if he was sure he had had a widow-maker heart attack and then shook his head and became quiet. The tech said it wasn't the first time that had happened with the catholic hospital system. We had a clergyman who wouldn't leave despite my telling him to leave. He also violated HIPAA not once but more than 3 times. It was such an experience that my husband will not seek ER care again nor will he consent to have in-patient care because he knows that despite what you may tell them, they will do what they please and probably bc you tell them what you will or will not allow, they will seek to intentionally harm/abuse.
JR, you & I both define that kind of unecessary exposure as sexual assault, I've experienced it, your husband experienced it. But most dumbass working Joes out there would stipulate that it's not sexual assault of there's no sexual gratification. We know their game of sexual humiliation, & I'm sure in your podcasts & blogs you get pushback about that definition. (Again, my frantic 02/07/24 emails about my knee scope being redirected to a facility where I'd be napked in a gown for 24 hours, has cost me friendships. Others don't look at it like us?)
I am confused about how/why your husband was labeled as gay.
The Catholic Religion's history of abuse is irredeemable. Not only priests raping kids (like Sinead O'Connor was taped) but brutalclassroom beatings by nuns & such. With that history, why be surprised? I to steer clear of Catholic hospitals
I will go out on a limb & charge both teaching hospitals & Catholics hospitals with a much greater level of perversity than is already extant elsewhere. I expect medical abuse from all Catholic & teaching hospitals. & I got the greatest resistance & arguments regarding underwear removal for my knee scope inquiries, when calling Outpatient Surgery staff at Catholic hospitals.
I'm sorry to everyone about monopolizing V. 130 because I am melting down & making near impossible demands for my back surgery 1) one small incision for all 4 bulging lumbars 2) one small incision for all 4-5 thoracic 3) no laminescomy or discectomy, just a scoped debris trim (because It's not feeling that bad) 4) a COVR garment worn 5) NO CATHETERIZATION ? & 5) NO OVERNIGHT STAY.(or it's curtains!)
I am emailing my PCP with that info (& a COVR link) for my phone consult on Monday. Dr Mo, you want physicians to comment on this blog. I can assure you she's got better things to do, but I'll invite her & send her the link in my email. She's not like the rest, or is so patronizing she just has me fooled
TC
https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2024-04-20/doctor-paid-leave-fired
TC,
We really don't know their reason but we have guessed it is due to the reputation the catholic hospital from hell has about gay but especially "married" gay men. My husband had decided for prostate surgery that he did not want to be at a teaching hospital that a set of urologists were connected with so the teaching hospital had that in his file and he again told them he did not want treatment at the university hospital system. Unknown to us, they were using his file from years and year ago that night. I also know the hospital from hell questioned if I was his "wife" because clearly by the file, they were expecting a man and only addressed our son bc we believe they thought he was the husband. When we requested the university MRs we saw in the transfer file that he was labeled as being "gay, married" (this is in black and white print). We then asked for the hell hospital MRs yet again and this time the transfer file came with it. The transfer file is what is used between hospitals and that was all the hospital from hell had that night. As I said earlier, the hell hospital at that time was actively involved in the Southern Court District of the US in a case bc they felt they had the right to deny any type of care they wanted to LGBTQ patients. To have my husband gay and married would have made it worse especially in a state that did not recognize gay marriage and with a hospital known to be so hostile. We can think of no other reason for this to be done to him except the university hospital knew what would happen to him because sadly other hospital systems are aware of the harm other hospitals do. This was confirmed when we had to go to a different hospital system to find out what had physically been done to him. We were told by several there they weren't surprised to hear of what happened to him.
The CCU nurse who sexually abused him in his patient room is on social media saying that no man can resist her beauty and sexual charms. With my husband being labeled gay and married (and she knew this from the file), I think she felt entitled and protected to try to "convert" him back or to try to show that at least she could get results from a gay man (hence the crowd she had in the room and all the laughter). In her social media, she talks abt all the "boys come to get her milkshakes" and how much she loves Mollys which working in a CCU she is like a kid in a candy shop bc many heart related drugs are "legal" Mollys. Mollys also make ppl sexually aggressive. It is so easy for medical workers to access patient drugs. T
The university hospital also knew the versed/fentanyl would render him into a zombie like state because he told them when he refused these meds. What they didn't know was although he would be unable to move and speak that he would remember bc he didn't tell them that. He also told them the use of that combo would make his BP drop low along with his breathing rate which it did. Scary thing is when Livanta was investigating they told us that doctors have the right to give patients any drug even ones patients have refused. Makes you feel all safe, right? They also said that he was being "unreasonable" in putting forth stipulations on his treatment options/methods. Guess Livant/CMS is not there to protect patients but rather the medical system. We should take tax funding away from them.
I would bet your MRs are full of subjective observations by your doctors. I doubt you are getting the full story even the Cares Act supposedly says we get all in the MRs with the exception of if a doctor would feel it is dangerous for a patient to know the content. If you haven't, I would request copies of your MRs from your PCP. Actually, nowadays all hospitals label themselves as "teaching" hospitals in order to attract residents. Of course, some are more "teaching" than others. I know I will not go to one nor will my husband.
JR
Was it pericarditis or angina simulating a heart attack?
TC
TC,
We don't know. What we do know is he is now stented which does cause forever issues such as shortness of breath, pain, and heart attack and many heart attacks once stented are fatal. After he found out there was no heart damage and they likely lied, he has kept his medical visits to only a yearly cardiologist visit where he gets in and out as fast as he can. He takes the prescriptions, fills them and throws them away. We have done the research and he is on a natural supplement program. The doctor cannot how well he is doing and has reduced the statin dosage because the supplement (unknown to the doctor are doing all the work). Doctor thinks he is taking just a few and we always say we cannot remember their names and forgot to write them down. He knows he has to live with foreign objects in his body as their is no taking a stent out and he knows that stents will cause a blockage at some point. The "cure" that causes more issues is how modern medicine works. It seems each time he goes he must fight for his bodily dignity even though it is marked in his file he is a victim of medical sexual assault as well as battery. It is marked they must use trauma informed care but as of yet, none of them have until they are forced to by either him or me. He has learned to stand up for himself but sometimes he is more deeply traumatized by them than at other times. He insists I am always present or he will not allow any type of care. We always carry his very advanced Advanced Directive that has been legally done. We know though if he would go in the hospital again, he very likely will be sexually abused or assaulted as that is standard care for male patients. That's why he refuses any in-patient or ER care.
I don't know who posted this link, but it's always UCLA, that bastion of medical rape. Kwing learned from the best.
My first reaction was finally, a boss with the integrity to do the right thing.
NO, this had been going on for more than a decade wamudst complaints from his secretary, & peers. The ultimate reason for the firing had to do with the kickbacks he got from the implant companies.
Kudos to the female physicians who filed this lawsuit
https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-news/female-doctors-sue-la-county-ignored-complaints-abusive-surgeon-rcna119562
TC
Wish I could sign in & edit. Misty Robert's "solution" to patient modesty concerns is "same gender medical care" & Louis Kwong is living proof of my reasons for admonishing against that as a panacea.
Frankly I chose women providers because it's easier for me to deal with their improprieties & sort of laugh it off as veiled flattery. A male's impropriety? I'll kill him
TC
Concerning the latest scandal at UCLA, one wonders how many high profile scandals and frequent mega settlements is it going to take before hospital administrators start taking complaints seriously?
TC to Biker
"Settlements" in favor of wronged individuals are rare. They constitute a pretty insignificant cost of doing business, & paid for by insurance companies. It's a parroted right wing talking point blaming the high cost of health care to "junk law suits" (malpractice or sexual abuse). Any medical sex abuse victim and/or anyone who's had a bad operation, knows that it's almost impossible to sue a doctor, the injury must be catastrophic, with no question as to blame. (Like amputating the wrong limb). Only 8% of malpractice cases get to trial, & few won, & high payouts overturned on appeal.
Malpractice insurance only accounts for 2% of health costs, & those are insurance company profits that support the Lear jets, yachts lavish lifestyle of executives! Not "settlements"!
In Texas, torte reform capped payouts at $250k (like a life, limb or eye is worth only that!) with the promise that healthcare costs would diminish, & healthcare would be more affordable. It was a lie as costs continued to soar.
That's the corporate way, sexual misconduct, physician malfeasance will always be profitable, same as pollution is profitable for Walmart in spite of the 4.5 million in EPA fines!
TC
What I found "funny" in that article is although the 3 women doctors mentioned he abused patients, I could not find where they mentioned they had ever told the abused patient or are a witness for the abused patient. Just as in the Sparks drama, the only motivation that I can see for their lawsuit is the wrong this male doctor did to them. They may have made complaints within the hospital system, etc. but they never cared to help the harmed patient. I really don't care if these female doctors get justice or not because it is clear to me their priority isn't the protection of innocent patients but rather protection of their career.
California has had a cap of $250,000 on malpractice for years. I haven't seen Newsome and the controlling party rushing to fix this travesty. The medical horror story blame can be squarely placed on both parties. In Indiana, Dr. Otis Bowen was a Repub. governor who made sure harmed patients would never get any compensation for their harm (yes, Bowen was a MD). The media mafia has power and control over both parties via their huge bank accounts which you and I pay for when we get their services. To in reality, we pay for them to harm us and to be able to get away with doing so. Most of the public is also complicit in allowing the harm to continue by remaining silent and some also help in protecting the medical mafia by denying harm happens.
The public believes that malpractice costs is what drives up the cost of healthcare which is entirely false. However, in states like California, when a big celebrity is harmed, we hear of the millions awarded in a settlement which helps feed this myth. All of those issues that TC mentioned about malpractice, Cindy and I have covered on our podcasts. Personally, my husband and I were told that even if they would take our case and he won, the hospital would keep appealing until a point where they knew we would get nothing. An attorney said that is how the hospital from worked. I know a physically harmed woman in South California who was offered a 20K settlement which after she paid the first and second set of attorneys, she would have been about 60K in debt. She was threatened they would completely ruin her if she didn't take the settlement.
In Florida, there is a law that allows the case to go to mediation where the doctor can settle for pennies and it is never reported as malpractice which allows unsuspecting patients to hire a doctor who has been in malpractice suits thinking he is a top-notch doctor.
The general rule for malpractice is the contingency comes out followed by expenses and whatever left is maybe for the patient because insurance will want to be paid back. So if a patient wins a 100K settlement that leaves 66K. Now for expenses, you can figure at least one or two "expert" at around 20K (probably more) plus attorney fees of probably equal to that. So now you are looking at 26K but don't forget insurance payback and taxes. So if a patient suffered a long-term injury, they are really out of luck. So much for malpractice being a big payday unless you are already rich and powerful like a celebrity.
@ JR
It would be fun to get a link to one of those social media sites (particularly FB) in which that scumbag nurse posted self-incriminatinatory claims that her patients can't resist her & keep coming back for her milkshakes. I'm personally curious, & as you know, outside of insular patient rights groups such as here, people accuse me of "sexualizing" the whole medical industry, & they can't, or won't grasp that nurses, such as she, even exist (let alone are more common than anyone thinks..)
TC
Sometime I will look for her posts were on Twitter which calls itself X. She talked about her beauty and how much she loved to be drunk/drinking. She also talked about talking Mollys. Some of her posts were very sexual. I know another one of the nurses had a past conviction in fraud. I know another one had a DUI. Lovely crew of lowlifes that we entrust when we are in our most vulnerable state. The interventionalist was from another country which has a reputation of not respecting women and it showed in his demeanor to me but then again he most likely thought because of the purposely inaccurate paperwork that I was a nobody and our son was actually my husband's spouse. As I said, they didn't know that my husband would be able to remember because he had told that to the other hospital before they gave him a massive amount of the drugs that he had refused. It would be interesting to know how many times patients are sexually abused because I am sure this is a group that does this on a regular basis. I am sure there are the some types in every hospital.
Now my apologies for so many monopolizing posts. I did contact the Palm Springs pain doctor's office manager who assured me my initial exam would not degrade into a 3rd party spectators sport. She did stipulate that the pain procedures would be done at the surgery center "downstairs" & wouldn't be able to guarantee me anything regarding the surgery center's staff.
That particular surgery center was the one where I originally wanted to have my knee scoped because they honor modesty requests of no underwear removal. (The Ortho surgeon declined because apparently was shooting for a more lucrative knee implant.)
The procedures might be 1) a spinal epidural but I can't get through to an admitting or administrative nurse. It would be funny if they insist on underwear removal for epidurals, but not for a knee surgery policy. Those usually have an x-ray tech -- at least.
The primary procedure is an ultrasound guided inguinal block, something that's usually done syringe in right hand, transducer in left --carefully coordinated by the same brain & eyes. I don't see the use of an assistant there, but need to reach someone. I'm a reasonable guy, & if a strong reasonable argument for physician assistantship is needed, then I'll cave in. However, physicians often want have assistants always present, for no good reason. Here, though it's the surgery center I'm dealing with.
I might be in business, last "dignity" concern ever, or...
TC
My back orthopedist was shockingly personable. He acknowledged Im health conscious & take care of myself, & told me my back MRIs are damn severe, but my symptoms belie that severity. Any surgery would make things worse.
He prescribed conscious, sedated epidurals, claimed me that the hot, Siberian blonde doctor I've alluded to, is the best in the business & a class by herself!. He said she doesn't take shit from anybody. (She seemed like a mousy pushover 11/10/23 12/22/23
Maybe I should shut my mouth (as you all know). I'm seeing her next Friday, & hope she didn't see my taunting Facebook PMs about her humongous Botox lips & silicone boobs.
I don't believe in epidurals, but won't accept this pain.
That was me going in about the pain doc I PMed
TC
Does anyone here think that awareness and adherence to patient dignity is far better in other countries than that occurring in the United States. From adherence to the dignity you all want, what country would you want to me medically-surgically treated for a disorder? ..Maurice.
Again, I apologize for monopolizing this blog. But to respond to this u quiring, other countries such as France force total nudity for the must unecessary circumstances. Those people are sensensitized to it.
England had complete yearly physicals in public schools . Everything, including rectal. Which is a somuty perverted.
Pediatricians treat "children" into early adulthood. Vaccination booster shots for them are done pants down, & over the secretary's lap, in a spanking type position -- not the nurse's lap.
As horrific as our health system is, we do have a certain puritanical cultural foundation that's "uptight" about nudity.
That said, our early to mid 20th century tradition of forcing school boy nudity at swimming pools is hard to fathom. This non-meducal phenomenon is relevant in our cultural context.
Dear Abby, & her twin sister, Anne Landers, were such militant enforcers of that schoolboy abuse, that they declared it "poor poolside etiquette" for any young man under (say 23) to wear swimming trunks around all the girls & women needed to know about "boys secrets".
According to them, any boy hesitant to shower communally was mentally ill & probably secretly gay. i kid all you not. It's still posted all over the internet.
Sorry TC above post referencing Anne Landers & Abigail van Buren. But with our uptight history, I still can understand how from a paying consumer ship standpoint, how we let things get so far out of hand that hospital enemas were mandatory for everyone, even those not requiring bowel prep. What were patients thinking by putting up with that?
Dr. Bernstein,
I do not have any experience with health care in other countries but my impression is that nudity is common and accommodations for modesty are more likely to happen in the United States.
I recently had another foot surgery and I simply ignored the pre-op nurse instructions to remove all clothing. I left my underwear on since this was foot surgery. The waist band was still securely glued to me after it was over.
EM
TC: (corrections to my last post: "I CAN'T understand how consumer patients let things get to where they were", not " I can")
More reasons to hate doctors!
1) Occupational "health". Preemployment physicals are mostly performed by physicians hired by third parties -- a flagrant conflict of a interest from the start, & scummy when taken beyond ADA guidelines of primary job functions (hernias classified as tertiary) people's privates examined on behalf of a boss. Then when a significant injury occurs, these same facilities downplay it's severity, or deem it the employee is faking.
2) Prison physicians & medical staff participating in executions, doing things like putting up stethoscopes to the chest of smoking, 200° prisoners & declaring them either dead, or primed for more juice in the electric chair. Lethal injections are also performed by medical staff
3) performing unecessary agonizing ER strip & cavity searches for border patrol & the police on demand, upon innocent victims. Doctors Intentionally protracting proceedings for many hours, in retaliation for victim's indignant protests of human rights violations & threats to sue while cusing them out. (These two links you're probably all familiar with)
https://www.prisonlegalnews.org/news/2015/dec/31/texas-hospital-settles-suit-over-improper-border-patrol-search-11-million/
https://www.ajc.com/news/man-minor-traffic-stop-ends-multiple-full-body-cavity-searches/WKirpNfIOgczMrAssqkNlN/
TC
So much for AI being the topic.
After reading some old posts I’m struggling to reconcile my (our) experience as a patient with the doctors experience.
I’ll quote “Stripped naked and left naked", without patient's understanding or acceptance as a behavior by physicians or nurses is a behavior I never have never never observed or heard of as a physician..” Maybe kids don’t count?
As a child I was in the hospital 3x. 2 ended in mental trauma.
I’ve already told my story on my 1’st experience at 7. 1 thing I only mentioned was being used as a training dummy for a nurses aid class. After a shower I had to stand there naked in front of 6-8 students while 2 girls prepped the bed.
The 2’nd stay when a nurse wanted to give me a suppository with the door open when I was 10 we went to war. They just brought in more aids to hold me down. We fought until I became exhausted and collapsed.
The next day I got yelled at by everyone. The head nurse. My mom. The doctor. I didn’t care. I’m gonna have a bad day, we’re all gonna have a bad day. I learned that from my 1’st hospital stay.
My 3’rd stay was for an emergency appendectomy at 15 in the 60’s. The prep, including getting a cath because I couldn’t pee with the nurse watching me, although I had to go bad, was manageable because I was in so much pain.
This wasn’t traumatic. Why? Because after the prep a doctor came in and gave me something “to help me relax” before they wheeled me to the OR.
After I was on the table the first thing they did was remove the sheet. Makes sense. A nurse started scrubbing my stomach area. I was naked but I just didn’t care.
To my left was the operating theater. I felt like I could almost touch the glass. Seated in the front we 2 doctors I presume, a male and a female. The male got up and left and came back with 2 cups of what I guess was coffee. I remember thinking to my self “I wonder if their going to serve popcorn.” Kind of odd thought but…
Another group of people were standing and talking, I guess waiting for the operation to start.
By now the nurse was painting my belly red. Then the anesthesiologist put a mask on my face and told me to start counting back from 100. I only remember getting to 98.
Even when I was 17, I had to go to the school nurses office for a physical. When you got there some girl told you to undress down to your underwear and get in line. You stood there with 10 or so other boys waiting your turn.
There were dividers, those flimsy white linen portable things set up for privacy. Of course there were gaps so the the girls that were helping there could see you standing there in your underwear. It was just acceptable. Man up as they say.
Do I think when the girls got their physicals boys were allowed into the nurses office? Not a chance. You weren’t even allowed down that hall.
I’ve given up fighting the system. Now whenever I go to a doctor, and in my 60’s I got a few, I take Valium. I just expect I might be inappropriately embarrassed somehow. It’s only happened maybe 10x in my life, but with PTSD each was very triggering.
But what I don’t get is how you have never seen or heard of any of this? Except maybe from the people here. Or it is possible I took your comment out of context.
I’ve also have had doctors that were very protective. They only exposed where they needed to. And they didn’t know I was traumatized. I never tell anyone.
You can see some people on here are very passionate about this because of the impact it had on their lives.
I’ll add this. I have absolute faith God allowed whatever happened to me for a good reason regardless of the physiological pain it caused. 50+ years of it. I might be a worse person had it not happened.
Sorry for venting.
Hello Brian,
Please, please, please never say, "Sorry for venting." I'm sure that I speak for all the other posters when I say that we welcome your venting. Dr. Bernstein, the moderator, has indicated that he feels that the blog serves a definite purpose in this regard. Dr. Bernstein has also mentioned something that many of us have taken to heart - SPEAK UP. Health care workers don't know your needs unless you tell them. Some personnel don't care and won't even listen to you. However, others may be compassionate and they will attempt to accommodate your needs. You lose nothing by asking for dignity/ modesty accommodations. Speak up. Let them know what you need to make you better, physically as well as mentally/emotionally. Try to limit the Valium. I wish you well in all your subsequent medical encounters. Take care.
Reginald
Thanks Reginald.
PTSD is a funky thing. Sometimes I can speak up and sometimes I can’t.
I do find most medical workers are very professional. Even in the 10 instances or so where I was what I considered inappropriately embarrassed, they really thought nothing of what they were doing. So it wasn't intentional.
I find it easier and safer for myself to take Valium than risk being triggered for weeks after a medical event. As it is I limit my contact with health care as much as possible.
TC to Brian
I'm so damn angry in your behalf, & so sorry for your adolescent mistreatment. I never had anything like that until age 64 my suicide attempt, tied to a bed in an ICU -- & the CA Department of Health wrote them up for it.
The worst that happened to me in the 60s was my pediatrician pulling down my pants all the way in front of my parents for penicillin shots, & they eventually fired him for it.
Most of the rage & mistrust I cultivated towards medicine was based on peer anecdotal accounts of hospital stays -- similar to yours. I've stayed away myself & usually fought back when provoked.
If Valium helps, more power to you.ist I know taking benzidiazipams long term, have burned away their synapsis & have severe depression & short term memory loss. Hopefully you'll be soared
TC, don’t let my unfortunate experiences trouble you.
As crazy as it may seem, everything, everything happens for a reason. A reason we just don’t understand and won’t until we pass on. I truly believe and know that.
I’ve had many many compassionate nurses and techs. And I did find research that the medical profession realized somewhere in the late 90’s I think that a higher than expected number of drug and alcohol users had been traumatized as children in the hospital.
So I think they have changed and are changing as far as children are concerned. Unfortunately it was too late for some of us. They just didn’t realize the consequences of what they were doing. It wasn’t intentional.
And as adults most people can stand up for themselves. I can’t when I’m triggered. I go back to that deer in the headlights.
I also used the phrase “inappropriately embarrassed.” That may be a bit strong.
As far as the Valium, I only use it 10-15 times a year during medical visits. If anything I self medicate in other somewhat controlled ways to treat my PTSD.
Well always exceptions, but only like a stopped click that's right twice per day. think that medical people's brains are hardwired to control & abuse others, just like public school teachers, cops & correctional officers. They are born financial & sexual predators, EVIL to the core , & I am unapologetically a very hateful person towards them
TC
It looks to me, as operator of this very, very many, many years blog thread topic, that all has been said here that needs to be said both from a tread constructive and personal emotional and experiential view points.
I hope that you here all know that the other hundreds and hundreds of thread topics is "super-duper" active with visitors every single day mounting into the many hundreds but they are only reading and there is no active writing compared to our topic here (which has currently fallen off). Doesn't these statistics tell us something about the world's interest in the issue of "patient dignity"? I have a "statistical feeling" that no active thread contribution throughout my blog does discourage others to write and contribute though they have plenty to read.
What is the conclusion to all this. The multitude of topics is there and stimulating reading but active contribution of views now years later is nil.
Any thoughts about our Bioethics Discussion Blog. To me it seems there may be tremendous reading but no further discussion.
Any thoughts on this active but throughout "no discussion" blog pathology? ..Maurice
Dr. Bernstein, most people would certainly be supportive of patient dignity if asked, but until they experience not having it as a patient, it just isn't going to be on their radar. Until then it is more an abstract concept than something patients deal with every day. People who post comments or otherwise join in discussions are almost always going to be the walking wounded so to speak. For many, just being able to read what others have written may be therapeutic without their feeling like they need to jump in themselves.
What I am trying to say here is just being there when someone had had a bad experience and wants to become better informed is a good thing even if they never comment themselves.
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Every week i am seeing new names tell their stories on Quora. It started with the same 6-7 people, most of whom are here as well.
My thoughts are also that MANY people just dont know any better. They "think" they were treated respectfully. However, then they go on to tell you about an ultrasound they had. The tech either exposed them or worse THEY were the ones to hold the guys penis out of the way. The guy still thinks it was respectful, because they "acted" professional. Once others chime in and say, you were totally unnecessarily exposed and her handling you was not professional,some stopto think. Not all, but definitely some. Now, hopefully next time he needs an ultrasound, he WILL say something. We will never change the mindset of the stubborn staff. But, we CAN change the mindset of the patients. My other biggest thing is reviews. While some may not have the means to shop around, others do. When you find a facility willing to work with you, book that appointment and tell them WHY they are getting your money. The next step is to write the other facilities and tell them WHY they are loosing your thousands of dollars and that you found a place willing to work WITH you not against. Cut into their bottom line and things will change. Cat
Did we discuss "holistic medicine" before?
Here is a definition:
holistic. adjective. /hoʊˈlɪs·tɪk/ relating to the whole of something or to the total system instead of just to its parts. Holistic medicine attempts to treat the whole person, including mind and body, not just the injury or disease.
If not, wouldn't conversion of the medical system to develop and strengthen holistic
behavior toward all patients of doctors, nurses and everyone serving within the medical system.
I apologize if we already covered this concept and threw it out of the medical care environment. ..Maurice.
Dr. Bernstein, holistic medicine would be nice but the assembly line nature of healthcare today seems to force doctors to rush from one patient to another. They are kept under time pressures by the MBA's in the corporate suite.
The family doctors of old who sort of served that whole person role that us Baby Boomers grew up with have been replaced with corporate medicine. I have forgotten the names of most of the doctors that I have seen in my adult life, but I still remember our family doctor from my youth.
Oh my gosh
This blog is still going after all these years. At this point I’m praying literally that Dr Maurice can ever get a break, take a stroll along the beach. Enjoy a cold refreshing drink while the tide wash’s over his feet and the ocean breeze cools him. I’m praying.
PT
PT, thanks for your praying for my beach experience. Actually, on April 7 2024, I was strolling along Santa Monica, California beach but I did not allow the tide to wash over my feet since there was a beach official notice to avoid sea water contact that day due to contamination. Retirement provides a bit more than "a break". ..Maurice.
Where is everyone? Do you all think our lengthy dissertation on the topic of Preserving Patient Dignity has reached it's limit for further conversation, expressions of concerns, expressions of further improvement, psychic ventilation and more and more? Did all who have participated here or just read here find no further value to this topic? Are we all getting too old to worry about our or all the other patients or potential patient's future? ..Maurice.
I’ve touched upon this particular topic several times and yet to have a clear Idea of what others may have encountered and how they handled it. Namely, I just called my urologist’s office on a follow up and again asked the person (the telephone operator) a question about scheduling a future test. While I was on the phone I asked her just how much of my file she had access to, she tried to be coy by answering “only as much as I need to schedule.” I politely reminded her that is not what I asked, the question was how much. After a little back and forth she frankly admitted she had access to the entire record. I then asked her how she would feel if the positions were reversed and I (an unknown person) had access to her record. She was honest enough to say she wouldn’t like it. But she was only interested in having enough access to schedule the appointment. My concern is, I consider privacy in my records to be a matter of personal dignity, conversations with medical staff (not ancillary staff) and other items that my be recorded and maintained in the computer system must be limited to only those with a medical necessary need. We are often told to be totally forthright and honest with our medical providers and I can understand why, however, those revelations must be strictly between the patient and the provider, not just about everyone answering the phone. I now look upon any and all questions, conversations, and interactions with medical providers with an eye to limiting to that which I would let any stranger know. It’s sad but information concerning my medical condition is one thing, but having just about everyone in the office know my name, address, SSN, date of birth, pharmacy of choice and other information which separately may be innocent but when put together places my privacy at risk. End of rant.
Hello Ohio Catholic,
The law seems to allow doctors to delegate to their staff access to patient files for "medically necessary reasons". Medical necessity is usually defined by the doctor. Therefore, almost anyone can be designated to access your file. The next time you visit your urologist tell him/her of your concerns. I think you'll find that you'll hear what I've mentioned above. Unfortunately, privacy is a thing of the past. Hopefully, you live in a larger community where everyone doesn't know everyone else's business. In small communities, others may know of your medical conditions before you tell your family members.
Take care.
Reginald
PS Dr. Bernstein, the dearth of posters may mean that they've had fewer negative medical encounters; or, just fewer visits to their doctor/hospital. I'd encourage everyone to post both good and bad medical encounters. It would be nice to know if any progress is being made to advance patient dignity. I wish you continued good health.
Ohio Catholic, the advent of electronic healthcare record systems was both a blessing and a curse. It benefits me greatly when I see a provider as they can look at my records to understand what has been done, test results etc rather than me having to interpret for them, or suffer delays while they seek a manual transfer of records from a different provider. The associated patient portals allow me to see test results, doctor's notes etc as well which is a benefit.
It is of course a curse for the reasons you state. Everyone I interact act has access to all of my records, most of which are not necessary to what they are doing, and quite frankly often none of their business. Living in a small town/rural area such as I do, it is one of the reasons I drive 1.5 hours each way for all of my scheduled care rather than getting it locally. It is all but impossible to be anonymous in settings such as I live and while it affords an overall quality of life urban/suburban dwellers can hardly imagine, I prefer that my health records remain private. HIPAA is not all that some pretend it to be.
All that said, the reality is more likely that in settings where you have reasonable anonymity as a patient that the staff have little interest in snooping or gossiping about your info. Individually we are but one of a long line of patients coming through each and every day.
I can rant. But I was trying to keep with the thyme of AI or not comment.
What they did to me as a child and some of the other boys in the hospital was entirely inappropriate. And it wasn't just 1 hospital. It was all of them I was admitted to. Yea it was a long time ago. But I’m still suffering the consequences.
That said, I've only experienced 1x where I held a doctor responsible for something inappropriate. That was when I was 25, went for a physical and the nurse, after bringing me to the exam room, told me to undress but I could leave my underwear on. Then she left.
Looking around there was no exam gown. So I stripped to my underwear because at that point I was triggered and just did what I was told.
The doctor appropriately knocked and then came in. As he did that I saw some of his office staff, who's desk was right outside, look in and see me standing there almost naked.
I hold him responsible for that because this was his practice. A gown should have been provided. You can bet I never went back to him. I was only embarrassed but triggered for several weeks.
All other encounters with the medical profession, where I considered what they did inappropriate, was by either nurses or medical staff. Never a doctor.
I would actually prefer a nurse that's assertive, demanding. Because them I can handle. It's the nurses that are either compassionate or the 1's that are indifferent that I can't handle because I get triggered.
So 50 years of being on high alert, hyper-vigilance. It was actually perfect for my job. But relief only comes with a drink. I can count on 1 hand the days I haven't had a drink in 50 years.
I had to add boundaries around myself, like no hard liquor except at parties or going out. No drinking before xx:xx pm. On and on. Otherwise I would be a down and out drunk.
I'm fortunate that I was able to do that. And I attribute that to God helping me.
It's been a sometimes painful journey. And over something so very stupid. I remember thinking when I was a kid how I couldn't wait until everyone that knew what happened to me was dead. We're almost there. But what an odd thought for a child to have.
Maybe I was mentally imbalanced back then, maybe even now. I don't know. But I do know I try and treat everyone with respect, not judging as much as I can. We've all got problems as far as I can see. The brain is just a weird thing.
You may see people who look like they have it all under control. BS. They have as many if not more challenges than the rest of us. I know I've not really shared my PTSD challenges.
God never said this life would be easy. In fact He explicitly said it would be difficult. Yet easy to bare if you rely on Him. I think I’ve fallen short there.
I’ll also say I have great respect and appreciation for my PCP. She’s younger but I’m totally comfortable with her. Her manner is impeccable. As are almost all my doctors. Now if we could just get the nurses on board with this. I don’t think that’s going to happen for a lot of them.
Ohio Catholic,
Information privacy is a huge concern. Hospitals, nursing homes, medical practices, etc. hire warm bodies to do jobs and those warm bodies are often times not the best people in society. Cindy and I talked about this on one of our shows. I had come across news articles where in certain states they were actively pursuing convicted felons for low level medical jobs. Now if those felons have issues that were not corrected during their prison and stay (and so very many of them aren't), they have access to all your private information such as what they need to still your identity. The articles that I have read on this subject do not specify if they draw the line at certain crimes like rape which is really scary because how would the ordinary person feel about a convicted rapist taking care of their grandma in a nursing home or their wife while she is under sedation? Programs like these add a another layer of unsafe for patients because we have no idea about the background of the person we are supposed to blindly trust while they actually have our life story in their hands.
As far as other information which would be considered medical, I believe there should be special access to those areas. The receptionist does not and should not have access and really neither should a MA because at most, they are just a certificate "professional". Cindy and I have discussed numerous times that most have no clue what numbers mean. For example, they won't think twice if they take a reading of 400/200 or 120/35 for BP. Both Cindy and I can attest to that because we have seen that happen. Cindy insisted on a RN who did come in and find the BP device was not working properly and actually did a BP reading with the old style cuff. The MA didn't know how to take a reading with the old-fashioned cuff. You would think in a cardiologist's office, this would be mandatory?
Archie (Banterings) wanted me to pass it along there is a book being written about patient dignity issues. At some point, my husband and I will be interviewed. I believe this is an important part in helping educate the public that medical harm via patient dignity harm does happen. Archie works tirelessly on patient dignity issues and I applaud his efforts to bring about change. It has been and is a long, hard road because the medical mafia is so powerful and so well financed that they have been able to snuff out change for years and years.
TC here.
Brian, I never go for physicals, no cancer screening. I'm so in tune with my body that I'll call attention to a problem (if I want it treated) I have phone visits every month with my great female PCP, (it's a partnership) we order imaging & meds as needed.
I am having serious thoracic issues that leave my abdominal muscles in spasms, so I went for an, that she seemed unrelated annual visit, no physical, but I threw my shirt off for her to observe an oblique asymmetry that we deemed natural & nothing to worry about. She didn't even touch me.
But as for things like underwear or gowns. I personally find gowns feminizing, demeaning & degrading. If I had a choice of nudity, or a gown, in an exam entailing genital exposure, I'd go naked. Fortunately I NEVER go fur those kind of exams. The only time if put on a gown is for a brief surgery, & the athletic shorts stay on.
For years I've been going to ALL medical visits wearing just a polo or sweatshirt, 3" or 5" hemmed elastic waistand athletic shorts (no underwear) because I DON'T WANT TO GIVE THOSE ASSHOLES THE SATISFACTION OF EVEN SEEING ME IN MY UNDERWEAR. They're so curt about being short on time? Well I demand more efficiency & come dressed ready to go.
Those bastards can examine your heart with your shirt on, & the torso by simply rolling up your shirt (which they normally do with me anyway) The shorts stay invariably on, but I'll fling off my shirt, even though I'm muffin topped & embarrassed by pot belly & love handles that I can't lose without losing muscle tissue too (old age dehydration) though with my shirt on, I'm always asked by nurses )who touch me a lot) & laypeople, do I work out. (You can get a good BP reading with a sweatshirt on, I go ballistic when those idiots tell me to roll up my sleeve & ruin the wrist elastic.)
That said, I like dressing light, like a beam bum anyway. I'll never forget (05/14/14) on my way to a bass ongig by a pool, I went to the ER dressed in a nice shirt, &5" hemmed navy blue shorts (no underwear). I had an infected molar (#3) working it's way to the sinus tissue I couldn't yet afford to pull it. The stupid intake MA ordered me to take off my shirt & shorts & put on a gown! I removed nothing, & the physician looked in my mouth, prescribed me antibiotics & even offered opioids, that I refused.
Again. I guess I'm both assertive & lucky in those situations.
TC
TC to Brian, It's astounding the nurse abuse you encountered in childhood. My only childhood abuse was my pediatrician demanding my pants & underwear down to my ankles in front of my parents, for my penicillin shots (every three months a middle ear infection) but they gave me a new doctor that launched a decade long golden age of no genital exposure. Then came the incident by a BU urologist in 1976.
I never had a childhood hospital stay, & my animosity towards hospital nurses came from other's anecdotes.
It wasn't until I was 31 in June '90 when I encountered two potential incidents of nurse misconduct: after a urologist told me to strip to my underwear, his urology assistant ordered me to take off everything from the waist down 3 times? I froze, & she finally left the room & didn't return with the urologist.
August '90 I went for an ilioinguinal block, & a hospital nurse wanted to personally dress me, & I told her sternly that I'd displace what's necessary at the time of the injection. She seemed put off & surprised. The pain doctor left the room to reload his syringe. & Immediately that same hospital nurse who tried to put me in a hospital gown, immediately barged in just to get an instrument from a tray beside the gurney. Nobody else was being treated in that hospital basement.but me! No sense of medical urgency driving her, just a desire to check me out. I kept it a secret from the doctor, being he'd scold her, or write her up. No!
(Decades later 03/08/22, another block, & he similarly left the room, the confusion of the pricedure unannounced by the customary band-aid --so I thought he was reloading the syringe -- but he brought his assistant right to me to sign the record release form! On 12/06/21, this same assistant, while sitting beside me on the exam table, teased me during the first intake process, then hugged me when she realized I was annoyed by it)
Summer '99 here were two nurse improprieties at a time when I couldn't step into a facility w/o being told how great I look & being doted over.touvhed & stroked I was very tan, shaved my body hair, & was asked if I'm.a bodybuilder (I wish)
My reactions to all this was an outrage on an intellectual level, but viscerally I was too damn comfortable, & was angry at myself for being so relaxed
Blatant sexual misconduct by an NP in September '02; on 01/15/15, a female neurologist pulled down my pants w/o warning & permission; 10/13/22 an ambush by a chaperone; 10/24/22 a scrotal ultrasound in which I was shanghaied into being a teaching subject at the threat of having to reschedule -- the student was doubling as a chaperone, I had time restraints so I went along. I was berated & yelled at by the nurse, & that was the last straw.
These are ALL my catalogued dignity violations, catalogued to the date. My point is, that I've successfully stayed away from these situations that weren't nearly as bad as yours, but when I am in those situations, the impropriety ratio is about 8 out of 10, I mean we're batting 800; here, but I have to say in most cases their demeanor was affectionate
To keep things intellectually honest here, I go to all visits wearing bodybuilding shorts & a polo shirt for bot comfort & convenience. I'm business-like, surly, have a rough sense of humor, but I also have an underlying steak of exhibitionist that maybe they're picking up on, but I NEVER take advantage of it. They try to take advantage, & I normally recoil from them & they're surprised.
But again, in reviewing those catalogued improprieties I have little to bitch about in comparison to you. I should count my blessings. Recently, I have been freaking out over impending chaperoned visits, but now I'm out if those woods too.
TC
Dr Bernstein,
Certainly I've said most of what I have to say here & on Quora. I was having a crisis regarding the inguinal scar, had good luck in the past with blocks, so I was pursuing an US guided one.
But I was totally freaking out about chaperone, & got banned from everywhere. I had a Siberian pain doc that works alone, but she left the practice. With no options left, I taped a swimming pool hose to my car exhaust & into a vent in my trailer. I decided to give it another shot, & make an honest effort. The pain is slowly dissipating on it's own, to the point it's foolish to do another risky procedure. Now that nearly five months elapsed, I can state that without fear of a 5150 ;intervention & no immediate threat of suicide with me now.
That means never again will I do much as unbuckle unzzip for any healthcare workers
My prostate is 151ml but fortunately growing away from my bladder, & doing fey well with Cardura. If it does grow out of control (it won't) I'd gladly each for the pool hose again, rather than go to those bastards for help.
I herniated T7 to T11 digging a trench 10/17/23 & exacerbated L1- to L5 (already herniated).
My symptoms should be much worse. Localized boney feeling of lumbars, thoracic pain is radicular thought my entire abdomen
I have a TPI of most of the thoracic scheduled 06/18 & Stem block of L4 & L5 pn 06/27
I was @00% distraught about this, but Tramadol, Tylenol, Gabapentin & voltarin controls it , along with stretching weight training that helps & doesn't exacerbated it. If the TPIs & epidural blocks don't work, I could be in opioids indefinitely, & I'll go with whatever works. Its life or death here, & I feel pretty good now.
Lastly, I am having my last hyaurilc acid injection this Thursday. The kneepain is horrid, & the clinics banning me has been lifted with that particular knee surgeon who intervened in my behalf.
But my modesty issues are behind me & I feel totally relieved, & am less impelled to rant
TC
TC @ Ohio Catholic
The question of receptionist privacy is something I haven't thought much about. At nearly all the PCP & specialist facilities, the receptionists are actively working as intake MAs, or assistants. Not only that, but when I have to part information that should go in my chart, the receptionists kindly give me there work emails so it can get scanned into my chart.
My take on it is that receptionists are so busy, they do not have reward n to pry into ones personal medical info. That said, when I have complaints about my treatment, I can talk about it with the receptionist.
Not only that, but the exchange of info regarding imaging at certain facilities makes it totally easier. .
Sometimes the lack of privacy is disoncerrting, but outside of my SSN. my medical information isn't useful to strangers like my credit card, so they don't care.
That said, it is VERY disconcerting that private vendors learn about my back & knee issues, & give me solicitation calls offering me knee & back braces
Totally uncool, & absolutely infuriating. My phone does intercept those 748 area code calls as spam now. But facilities selling my private information to spam calling vendors should be jailed.
I'm reminded of a "Curb Your Enthusiasm" episode in which Larry David goes to a proctologist that his friend records mmended. At his visit, from the start, he gets into a pissing contest with the MA when she asked what he's there for. & he kept saying he doesn't want to tell her, he's thee to see the doctor ctor, not her. Finally in exasperation he goes, "OK, aim here because there's a gerbel in my butt. OK? Via his network of friends who see that proctologist, it gets out, & everybody believes he really had a gerbel up his butt.
I've often lauded my PCP here, but she betrayed me irreparably.
My first back MRI was with Radnet on 02/21/23, back pain was minor, but the disc damage was severe Then came the trench digging accident on 10/17/23 that proved life altering.
Because I had time constraints, I got an inferior MRI & radiology report outside of Radnet My PCP admitted that the report was useless, but refused my request to redo the MRI at Radnet. To this day there's no info on the extent of the 10/17/23 damage. It is considerable, my abdominal muscles are seizing up from the radicular thoracic pain, & today all 5 lumbars hurt so much I couldn't stand.
Then on 01/18/24 my second to last pain doc option blew up, & I decided to commit suicide & attached my car exhaust to my trailer with a swimming pool hose. (I took a photo to send with delayed suicide notes to all those who betrayed me.) Then I decided to give it one last try..
The last try isn't going well. A spine surgeon sent a prescription to my last pain doc, for an all 5 lumbar epidural. The pain doc capriciously usurped that suggestion, only because in the exam, pressing against L4 & L5 caused me slightly more pain than the other lumbars. But they alk hurt like Hell! . He ordered a "stem block" of only L4 & L5, which is totally inadequate. Today all my lumbars hurt so much I can't even stand for a minute. All 5 lumbars must be saturated in kenalog.
This pain doc totally lacks cognizance. He's from India, & I will unapologetically say that third world docs are a disgrace & thorn in the side of decent Americans. He is tactless, doesn't understand pain, & incognizant . But because of medical conglomerations & pain clinic "chains " (like the oil companies) I have nowhere else to go. The June 27th stem block will be 100% counterproductive -- & having a poor radiology report to go by was a ker factor. (By his own admission he can't read MRIs & berated the bad report!)
Today I ripped into my PCP for her negligence. I emailed her the photo of the hose attached to my car exhaust* & let her know it's an act of grace that I gave those self serving medical motherfuckers a second chance to help me & they're failing me, & reminded her that I will not live past Summer to fix this back problem. I told the pain doc this & he is still undertreatment the problem. I am not going to be around so he can experiment, protract this & milk the insurance company one aggressively thoracic TPI, one lumbar epidural & we are done! He is calling my bluff.
I haven't emphasized here the extent of the loss of mobility my bad knee has cost me an entire year. I I average only one hour per day out of 24 doing only essential standing activities. I haven't done a laundry or cleaned my linens in over 6 months. The whole trailer stinks. I am living in profound filth & squalor because I can't stand without badly exacerbating it. The inflammation from the meniscus *repair" surgery made it worse, the ensuing Hyaluronic acid injections are causing more inflammation. The pain's unbearable & it'll be months before I can get a cortisone injection.
Now the back? It's probably treatable with an aggressive epidural, but no competent pain docs around to do it.
But my point is that my PCP is not an exception to the rule that all doctors are evil. That cunt betrayed me by refusing the MRI on 01/16/24. She had no interest in finding out how the post 10/17/23 damage worsened from the 02/21/23 MRI.. She's evil & worthless like the rest, & her negligence will probably cust me my life
*After 90 days I can be open about past suicide attempts, & I can say that I'll take my life if this pain continues. I'm experienced with welfare checks from my three hard years waiting fur the outcome of my SSD hearing. I made it clear if I lose my disability hearing, I'll take my life. The sheriff deputies got it, not mental health but "quality of life" issue, & all but handed me there service pistols to end it,after hearing my life story.
TC
TC… Keeping you in my prayers. For all my complaining mine is strictly mental pain. Not physical. And I can self medicate. May not be the most desirable solution but it is what it is.
Praying your able to find some medical relief to your pain.
Yo dramatics to my negligent doctors, I sat asyivLly injested over 20,000 mg of Tylenol in less than 8 hours. I notified my physician in her portal after every dose.
Other than extreme rectal burning & e trend side & back pain, I'm not jaundiced : dead yet. But they know about my Tylenol of. The pain doctor, not offering help fur my back pain. Did. Welfare check instead - I blew off the police. I hope my liver intimately dies fail.
If the last posting (by an unidentified author) is from TC, please explain, if you are still alive, what you were trying to emphasize in the mechanism of medical care. Does the medical profession regularly lead their patients into such a terrible life that self-injury or suicide is the only alternatives? ..Maurice.
Yes it was TC. The bottom line is that I'm crippled with pain & it's a 100% hostile world, with medical providers being the most evil people on the planet. I aired my personal shit here so much do you have to ask? OK: here goes part I
Right now I am virtually crippled with knee & back pain & can't even clean & organize my belongings (I'll send you a photo of the squalor I'm trapped in) AND VANT GET DECENT PAIN TREATMENT! I WON'T LIVE WITH THIS! I can't even stand more than one hour in a 24 hour day & DOCTORS DON'T CARE!
It started with three consecutive bad inguinal TPIs that's badly exacerbated d genital pain that I SIMPLY WON'T LIVE WITH (particularly knowing the vericoselectomy was a medical assault I didn't consent to). This was THREE YEARS AGO, & I haven't since found a pain clinic/doctor that will give me an ultrasound guided inguinal block with decency & dignity.
One chain clinic in Rancho Mirage, CA had a fluoroscopic block prepared for me & with two passive observers waiting for me to undress, & to see my dick & balls I just walked out.
Another pain doctor at a big hospital in Rancho Mirage had an ultrasound block ready with three assistants poised to have me strip off in front of them. NO! I left with my clothes & dignity. (Same nig hospital that arranged an unconsented overnight stay for a simple knee scope & I went ape shit in them!
Sex abusing learning institutions such as USC & UCLA will make my treatment a spectator sport not only for students, but any ancillary staff, visitor or salesman. They made it clear through "Patient Experience" I have no modesty rights & must go elsewhere. Even easy back epidurals mandate underwear removal I will take my life before I let any medical control freak force unecessary exposure on me. (LLUH has no chaperone policy, because of no sex scandals kindly agreed to do a blind block without a Fellow present, but they don't use Ultrasound, & blind blocks got me to where I am!
What's left? Just a few chain pain clinics, all of them have scribes, NO EXCEPTIONS. A scribe will NEVER SEE MY BUTT OR DICK. IT ain't gonna happen because I HATE them, I'LL DIE FIRST.
I asked one for "reasonable accommodation" to put the scribe behind a screen it outside, & my reasonable request was denied . I complained to the DOJ & sent the copy of the case to the CEO & I was banned the next day. The OCR of the HHS is still investigating, upon an oral summation I gave, she said, "THAT'S RETALIATION!. But know she's left the case open for six months & has done nothing.
Part II
(Concurrently I could not get my severely damaged meniscus tear surgery ANYWHERE w/o mandatory underwear removal that I won't tokerate that's left me unable to take care of myself)
Then on 11/10/23 I went to a pain clinic with that formerly hot looking blond Siberian who generally works w/o assistants -- I thought I died & went to heaven, a US guided inguinal block that's not a spectator sport for passive observers. (keep in mind I was banned from nearly everywhere. Last chance or I'll take my life!)
To backtrack here, a previous MRI showed serious lumbar damage that I had no idea was present. My PCP recommended first an epidural to L2 to address the inguinal pain (not entirely sound idea) but the Siberian pain doc went along . However, after moving in here & violently digging water & utility trenches with a mattock (the ground's like cement) I severely destroyed 5 thoracic discs & exacerbated the herniated lumbars on 10/17/23, not knowing just how serious it would become.
On 12/22/23 the Siberian doc attempted an epidural (left side) of L2, L3, L4 & L5. The bottom two hurt so much she had to take out the syringes. We agreed to reschedule another epidural attempt 01/24/24, under oral valium, but that self serving Siberian bitch failed to send word upfront, it was another epidural, not just follow up, even though I told the front desk the procedure was aborted & had to be rescheduled.
I knew it was wrong attempting an epidural with an old MRI, & got my PCP to order another MRI for the 01/24 epidural however, Radnet could not schedule before the 24th so I had to go to a terrible Hospital in Victorville for the MRI on 01/12/24. The radiology report told us NOTHING, . (I latee begged my PCP to reorder it through Radnet & she flat out refused, even though she acknowledged it read more like an x-ray. )
On 01/18/24 I got definitive word that the epidural hadn't actually been rescheduled & that the Siberian physiatrist would leave on 02/02/24. That day I reached a breaking point because of the crippled knee (no.modesty oriented knee orthopedist/facility, & debilitating genital pain, & always denied the basic dignity of no unecessary genital exposure, & getting banned for not playing their perverted game. I hooked up my swimming pool hose to my exhaust, & taped it into a vent in my trailer. Then I decided to give those medical bastards one last chance to help me.
I found a Victorville surgery center that doesn't require underwear removal, though the knee surgeon told me they do remove underwear under anesthesia. One thing lead to another & because I live alone, they redirected me to a hospital that would strip me naked & hold me overnight in a gown. I'll die first.
04/93/24 I was s oped by a decent knee surgeon & hospital, but the left meniscus wear is extensive, after 3 hyaluronic acid injections it is still killing me. I can only stand 45-60 agonizing minutes. I was warned the damage might be permanent, time & a kenalog injection will tell. But I will not live much further with this knee pain, & open surgery knee implant is not an option. Carbon monoxide is better, & I mean it!
Part III
So this still left me without the genital pain treatment, I'll admit it can almost go away, putting my modesty concerns at rest until the inguinal pain comes back with avengeance. I did find one last hope, a Palm Springs pain doc from India who works out of his office & a surgery center (where he'd do the US guided block). The ADA officer at that center agreed to have him do it with just the two of us in the room (according to HIS wishes, but I don't know yet.)
However, I have a much more serious.problem. The thoracic pain lights up my whole abdominal muscles, & it's not going away. The lumbar's were just sore (no sacral issues) but now have become so inflamed I can't stand up straight.
A spine surgeon sent a prescription to the Palm Springs pain doc for an epidural of all 5 lumbars, but failed to address the thoracic pain which was worse. He also recommended skin deep superficial stuff such as massage & acupuncture that infuriated me.
So on May 23 I saw the Palm Springs pain doc , who agreed to do TPIs for as many thoracic discs as I want , but ignored the prescription for all 5 lumbars just because 4 & 5 hurt more when he pressed them I made it clear: all of them hurt and feel fused from T7 to S1, & need to be saturated in kenalog! He smugly denied it, so it's scheduled for 06/27/24.
The other day I woke up feeling good, messaged my PCP about how good the opioids , Gabapentin & Tylenol are working, but by 5pm my whole torso, ALL the lumbars gave me the worst back pain ever.
So Dr Mo, you ask why I'd be suicidal? Because the pain is unbearable, it's all I can think about! I'm 67, it only will get worse. I've been crippled for a year with pain since my last 06/01/23 suicide attempt & living in my car. Now my trailer is filthy & I can't clean it, it's been 7 months since I could go to a laundromat, it.evrn smells & I can't live like this. I have set a deadline of this labor day to restore full functionality . I will never get it because I will never get the full lumbar epidural I NEED! AND NO PHYSICIAN GIVES A SHIT BECAUSE THEY ARE EVIL. LOOK AT WHAT THEY'VE OUT ME THROUGH THIS YEAR!
TC
Dr. B.,
I will give you answer for your question. Yes, medical care does sometimes lead to harmed patients taking their own lives. I have known of several people who have and I know several that probably will at some point and time. It is a frequent happening? Probably not but it is often enough because no one should feel forced to take their life because of harmful medical care. I have said time and time again there are no viable avenues of recourse for most harmed patients. The thought that a malpractice suit can easily happen and frequently happens is a very huge disinformation campaign fueled by the medical mafia. Most patients will never file a malpractice suit because they cannot get representation and those who do unless they are rich or powerful will see nothing come of it. Government agencies which are supposed to protect patients really only protect the medical mafia because it is the medical mafia that has all the power and money. I know these things because of my husband's harm as according to the attorneys, he wasn't harmed enough and according to the government groups, the crimes weren't admitted to in the medical records.
So patients are left to deal with the aftermath of medical harm. Some will turn to violence as did that man in Oklahoma. We are told violence is on the rise against medical people so this might be one result of patient medical harm. Some will commit suicide because they may have so much physical, mental, or both pain they cannot go on. Some, like my husband, will live with it but it greatly alters their quality of living. It is sad that medical harm is a silent happening as really no one cares about it or the damage it does. There have been a few good research articles about it. Cindy and I have even done a couple shows about the lasting side effects of medical harm.
I hope that TC hasn't been pushed to the brink of no return because he doesn't deserve to be a victim of medical harm.
I don't think you or many in the medical field have a true understanding of the trauma of being a harmed patient.
JR my belief system would never allow me to commit suicidal but what do you call it when deception, ambushes and flat out refusal to accommodate your needs to prevent any further
Emotional harm prevents you from seeking medical treatment? 5 years of therapy has not changed how I feel about the treatment I have received. I guess my question is does my refusal to seek treatment suicide on my part or a form of clandestine murder on their part?
They have already killed the part of me that made me who I was and wouldn’t hesitate to finish the job if given the opportunity
Part IV
At my May 22 visit with the Palm Springs pain doc from India, he kept scolding me & berating me for not having my MRIs at Radnet. I kept explaining, I had time restrictions with the Siberian pain doc & Radnet wouldn't take me. I also told him my PCP refused me another MRI. Not my fault. He goes, "next time go to Radnet!"
He then showed me how blurry the images were, & asked why I didn't go to Radnet. Same answer, he then goes, "next time go to Radnet".
Tuesday when the lumbar pain hit me so hard , & knowing I'll never get a complete epidural thanks to the Indian pain docs stubbornness, I went ballistic!, I messaged my PCP & blanked her for not redoing the MRI. (Her original excuse was that Medicare wouldn't authorize it if she did, but she didn't even try). She then messaged me back claiming it was my decision to go to Sr Mary's instead of Radnet because it was closer. NO! Then I went totally ballistic in her for blaming me. No, I had a 01/24 epidural coming & she had no business originally sending me there with an old MRI that was taken prior to the 10/17/23 injury. I took matter in my own hands &' was working with time constraints beyond my power & my PCP forgot that clusterfuck involving the Siberian physiatrist! (That drive me to near carbon monoxide suicide on 01/18/24)
Then I messaged my PCP twenty times. "You want me dead". I won't get a decent epidural because I didn't get a decent MRI. If I can't get pain treatment. I'll have to self medicate. I just took 3 x 650 mg of Tylenol. I messaged that again. I messaged, "NOBODY LISTENS TO ME!" Again _ again I messaged her about each 1850mg if Tylenol I took. I didn't care about my liver, I didn't t care about it now. I also sent her a photo of the hose hooked up to the exhaust & my trailer. "This is what you want, this is what you're getting, otherwise I would be in that position. This is all you! "
I also kept writing that in response to my claims of her negligence, she can dump me as a patient, it'll put me over the edge, drive me to suicide. So I wrote, " MAKE MY DAY".
I kept taking dose after dose of handfuls of Tylenol, sardonically thinking, "now the pain wILL go away for good".
She was nice during the phone visit. Said she'll never dump me. Reminded me that she always prescribed the meds I asked for. About the MRI, she said any specialist can read the images w/o a good radiologist's report. Maybe so, but can assure you all the specialists did was gloss things over. She offered to order another MRI (too late) call the pain specialist if he'll talk to her, but she admitted that doesn't usually help matters.
TC
Final part
After talking & screaming at my PCP & her staff on the phone, "YOU WANT NE DEAD", I emailed the office manager of the Palm Springs pain clinic with the 01/18/24 photo of the hose attached to my car exhaust. I wrote, "I decided not to inhale carbon monoxide that day because I decided to give you guys in the medical profession one more chance, & YOU'VE BLOWN IT!" I have 5 herniated lumbar you won't inject. & It'll be a DEATH SENTENCE!" YIU WANT NE DEAD! " YOU WANT NE DEAD!"
I called them, the office manager was out, I told them they are TANKING my case, that I've set a deadline, & they will be killing me. They want me dead, & that I've already injested 20,000 mg of Tylenol.
I got a call from a cop circling around my old JT address. I assured him no immediate threat, but they're negligence will be the end of me. He goes, no 5150 but why don't I take you to a hospital to look at your back. I go no help there & hung up.
The pain clinics office manager called me & said she did the welfare check, & that I have to stop threatening to commit suicide. Shell forward the emails to the pain doctor.
I suppose he'll discharge me as a patient soon.
As for the Tylenol, I had dry heaves, rectal burning after a bowel movement, extreme pain in right side ribs & back. But I always have that side & back pain from the thoracic injury. I'm not jaundiced & hopefully I will just die, but I'm never that lucky.
So Dr Mo. Why ask such a question. I Have you been reading? Doctors are evil. They abuse & neglect, but get paid just the same! I've been chronically fatigued & unable to hold a job since my mid-thirties. For decades I was called a malingerer to my face by doctors, who then used up the rest of my visit time trying to examine my prostate. Amazing the interest doctors give reproductive organs at the expense of real issues.
I'm adamant, I will fight unecessary intimate exposure to the death, have walked away from needed treatment because I won't put in a peep show for staff. I'll die first, no hyperbole.
Nor will I grow old like everybody else. I will not live in pain, I will not sacrifice my mobility or independence, so I will chose the time, place & means of my own death. never wanted a family, I wanted an orchestral conducting career with all the encouragements & social rewards that gone with it. . I don't harbor the illusion that I'm part of something greater & magnificent than myself, & it's my dutu to God & mankind to put up with all those slings & arrows of outrageous fortune. It's a hostile Universe & world & I spit on all of it. Down on my luck, homeless several times, all my "friends" betrayed me except one. I have reason to hate everybody's guts
RC
I presume the author of the last posting before mine here RC is actually TC.
I hope my blog thread if not diagnostic is actually therapeutic.
JR, can you directly provide, through your research and public presentations provide therapeutic tools which will help TC get emotional and hopefully therapeutic relief of his clinical-social-personal symptoms and still be alive and able to get some pleasure out of his remaining life.
Tell us again how your personal activities has helped you and even your husband's to find some pleasures in life and living.
..Maurice.
Yes this is TC. Maurice, you are starting to piss me off as much as Archie! STOP RIGHT NOW! Stop using language that implies that I suffer from "curable" "socio-clinical symptoms" that are caught like the common cold. That type of terminology is fabricated by Messiah complexed " professionals" such as yourself to validate your interventional involvement & $$ cost! No pathology here. I am the most lucid individual here, do not want anybody's advise or "therapeutic" help, so I'm preemptively warning those to "FUCK off" if they think they have anything to offer me.
Im a rational person who has objectively assed my own situation. No performing career; I'm culturally refined fish out of water in a desert full of tweakers & Philistines (like-minded people are diamonds in dunghills & I've had it with dung); I have little use for male platonic friends; I've been burned too much & won't let it happen again; no sexual interest in soccer moms (I hate kids!) or anyone not goodlooking enough to model professionally (I look great for 67 but am not in my cultural venue) ; people suck, they are evil, & I'm not weak ' impressionable to let that obvious perception be challenged by anyone. My only real compatible companion was my Blue Fronted Amazon who's dead & cannot be replaced; & it's impossible to live on $1200 per month (hopeless poverty) of my friend back east didn't pay my auto insurance over the phone I'd be dead now!
I DECIDE, not JR or you about all my matters. It's MY decision to commit suicide before exposing myself to a chaperone;. & that won't be changedI WILL NOT LIVE WITH THIS PAIN, & compromise my independence, autonomy or MOBILITY (which is lost & must be regained in 2-3 months! No pathology here! (You wish Maurice because your ego & livelihood depend on it!)
Here is a clip from the only honest therapist in the world. He stares that in 50% of suicides, there's no pathology, no depression or such. Some men take a rational look at their lives & conclude theirs is a life not worth living.
https://www.facebook.com/reel/398478986481041?mibextid=9drbnH
TC
TC, in no way am I going to tell or tell you how to live your current life. I am pleased that with this blog you have the opportunity to express your feelings about your life and all our lives, in general. This, the specific function of this blog thread, is preservation of patient dignity which includes your dignity to express your feelings and goals. ..Maurice.
Jeff,
I don't think it would be considered suicide on your part but it is IMO murder on their part. There really is no valid reason they cannot accommodate your bodily privacy requirements as those requirements are only basic human rights. You have the right to decide who touches or sees your body as it is truly the only thing you own so to speak. Also, you do take care of yourself and are not actively pursuing a means to end your life. For you seeking treatment on their terms would add mental harm that could endanger your physical recovery so IMO you are trying to protect your health in the best method available to you.
TC,
I am not trying to control your life but rather Dr. B. asked me how we have dealt with my husband's trauma. You are wasting your anger on me. I have dealt with a close friend of mine who is a doctor who is dead set on ending her life through assisted suicide because of medical harm done by a large, southern CA hospital system. She has went through the mediation process that system requires only to be further abused. Although I do not agree with her decision and feel she has so much to offer, she will at some point go to Sweden to end her life. The only thing preventing her from doing this is arranging for her horses' care and the money as she needs someone to travel with her. She is in a great deal of physical pain and also mental pain.
Dr. B.,
I guess the big difference I see between TC's and my husband's situations is that my husband had/has a support system which also my friend is lacking one. We also have a number of animals who depends on us for their care as I rescue cats. My husband is one who is able to keep busy enough not to think or talk about what happened to him unless he is triggered. He avoids medical care and only accept care on his terms. He relaxes with family times including the animals which calm him. He spent so much time directly after the harm just holding our one little dog. I think he held him 24 hours a day because he didn't want to add more pressure to me as I already had extreme guilt in allowing the harm to happen to him by making him seek hospital care and not realizing quickly enough how they were harming him. Music is another avenue along with walking and taking our convertible for long rides. We also bought property in the TN mountains to build a house that will allow us to leave Indiana and no longer be near those who harmed him. He is also very supportive of the show I do with Cindy to educate the public that medical harm does happen. Yes, he does get triggered and probably always will but we have learned methods to deal with it. Archie was a major help. He did not seek therapy because he wasn't going to place hope/faith in the very system that harmed him in the first place. He learned his lesson well the first time. He simply avoids them. He trusts none of them because he now knows he has no way of knowing who is wanting to harm and who isn't. My husband is tough and is a fighter. He has a quiet strength that has grown more determined since his medical harm.
Hello TC,
I believe that life is sacred and that suicide is not a viable choice. These are my views and, they may not be yours. There are myriad reasons why one might consider suicide. One might feel hopeless, purposeless, lonely, rejected, enduring excruciating pain, etc. If these feelings are engendered by others, suicide may seem like the answer to one's problems. However, the loss of one of us is a loss to all of us. There are compassionate people out there willing to help. Finding them might take some effort; nevertheless, the reward might be life-saving.
Take care.
Reginald
@Reginald. "Give me Liberty or Give Me Death". "Live Free or Die".
Why complicate matters by " ministering or preaching to me"? It's simple, I will not tolerate intractable pain, loss of mobility, loss of autonomy, independence & dignity.
Reginald, you used the word "sacred" which BY DEFINITION, has its roots in religion, & you can't backtrack from that now! (Even if you claim not to be religious, religion has infected secular thought & culture without people seeing it.) The essence of religion is little else but suffering, sacrificing, bearing a cross for "others" (enemies) all under a ridiculous, unsubstantial notion that somewhere the sky spook, cloud being set aside hidden rewards.
In Western Society that notion has its root in exploitation (the Bible endorses slavery which itself should alienate any rational person). The purpose of religion in Christianity was to make complaint slaves, serfs & soldiers willing to sacrifice, or commit any evil act (kill rape & pillage) for "King & Country". In other words, Christianity & it's Eastern counterparts, are evil persecution tools. The hyper-religiosity still prevalent amongst blacks in the Bible belt is a slavery vestige. They we're brainwashed to believe that the horrible atrocities committed towards them by their "owners" were their entrance fee to Heaven where it would all be made right.
So Reginald, I've eschewed fairy tales, superstition & brainwashing since I was 5 years old, when my Sunday school teacher told us our pets don't go to Heaven, because they don't have souls like us. It hit me then this is all bullshit & made up.
Preserving life at the cost of quality of life, only gives efficacy to injustice & makes us sitting ducks to our enemies that want to protract our suffering.
Your assertion about all those "compassionate" people out theree is wishfully thinking. It's dog-eat-dog & it's me against the 8 billion if you -- all the more reason to show nothing but contempt towards the Universe.
I'm not a weak, impressionable child who buys into nonentities. My perspective is well forged, carefully calculated, & no therapy or ministry is going to change it. I know my own situation better than anybody. If you value life to the extent you're willing to spend the end of it at a continuing care facility where a young female MA changed your diaper & cleans the ness from your privates, go for it! But NOTHING IS SACRED in a world of suffering where beings existence is so devaluated. If life were sacred, we'd be treated right!
TC
JR, Dr Mo wanted to refer me to you for "counseling" & I eschew any motion that therapy has anything substantial to offer. I'm no longer a weak impressionable teenager, & can see what a scam therapy is. About as substantial as Astrology, Scientology, Tarot cards, Ouija boards, etc (my abnormal Psychology professor at UC Santa Cruz made the same observation in 1984: psychology research is substantial, but no real science to therapy.)
I guess those who can't define & sort their own terms need therapy. If a teenager comes in & says, I want a decent relationship with my parents, the therapist can ask. "define decent" & if "decent" is not defined in the kids head, it can be of sone value.
Clearly I have things well catalogued in my mind's filing cabinet, & a full rational understanding of life, how things work, & what to expect from people. (I've been around the block long enough so I see everything coming.
I've been through therapy, & was once in 1978 told by my psychologist, I shouldn't have to tell you this because your supposed to discover it yourself, but you are the worst product of intrusive/narcissistic parenting EVER. He said that people view me as a stereotypical spoiled only child who's weak & had everything handed to me, but he knows better. He knows that I eat nails for breakfast & spit out tacks for lunch, with an impenetrable wall around me I had to build to deal with my parents insanity.
The therapy at went on to say, once I get out into the world I'll see not everyone's line your parents, & there are lots of nice people. He also preached a "learn to love yourself, & everything false into place! I got self esteem, nothing fell into place, I regret even considering his leaving home to a pretty hostile world with such a foolishly trusting mindset. The outside world was far more hostile than my home environment, & when I came home broke I was welcomed the prodigal son. Much of what tgerapysts preach is made up wishful thinking line religion.
If you are a mundane person with generic interests the world isn't too terribly hostile or empty. But no therapy is going to get me to like pop culture, to dance to rock, to party drink & smoke pot, to tolerate screaming kids, to find middle aged women, or even find plain looking young ones attractive. It won't happen! Never! Maurice's attempts to get me "the help I need" is an effort to try to turn me into " Joe Sixpack" & I must say, at age 7 or 8 I decided that a "normal" life would be a tragedy for me.
I find it offensive for Maurice to project his clinical diagnosis onto me, like I'm a naive , weak-minded confused kid. I reminded him of the notion that when a physician has only a hammer to work with, everyone & everything around him is just a nail. In such a corrupted, evil world, I think it's 100% inappropriate to put the honus on a victim to seek psychiatric help instead of putting the blame on the evil doers that drive people to suicide. Instead of going to the psychiatric PDR, go to inequality.org & see how the misery index (suicide, murder, crime, STDs, spousal abuse, drug abuse & alcoholism, teenage pregnancies, illnesses, etc) are caused by social & financial inequality.
But we are sidetracked, where is it carved in stone that anyone must tolerate getting old, sick & feeble? It isn't. So all of you stop pretending you have that insight!
TC
Actually, TC, I have had no intention to make any sort of a clinical diagnosis of you or your life. I did think that, in some ways, JR may have been of some supportive value as she has described her listening and speaking to others with issues involving the medical system.
What I am pleased is that this blog thread has been available for you to express your views and feelings and for others to learn about issues they may have not fully considered which could be affecting themselves, their health and their lives. TC, thank you for your participation here. ..Maurice.
A pain clinic is undergoing an interminably open "retaliation" investigation, while another pain clinic flat out refused to send my PCP (the referring physician) my records. In a correspondence about said refusal she wrote me:
"
"A violation of an individual’s right to access records is covered under HIPAA (45 C.F.R. § 164.524). So you may wish to file a HIPAA violation complaint."
I submitted the complaint & the case was closed, claiming HHS has no power regarding quality of cars, & I should just contact Lavanta.
So the pain clinic thumbs it's nose at the law, knowing there are no consequences from the paper tiger federal agencies, that just pass the buck. No justice!
Dr. Bernstein,
Page 1 of 2.
I am writing in response to your questions posted on May 31, 2024. I don’t think the topic of Preserving Patient Dignity has reached its limit but as Reginald said, “…the dearth of posters may mean that they've had fewer negative medical encounters; or, just fewer visits to their doctor/hospital.” There may also be some fatigue in addressing the issue, but I think some people might have moved to newer platforms such as Quora or Reddit. I much prefer this format because the entries are linear and it is easy to find and read the new entries. This platform is also anonymous and it seems that Reddit and Quora are not.
I have not had a real issue concerning patient dignity since my problems from 10 years ago. However, I am now at the age where I am developing Prostate problems and the issue of Patient Dignity will once again come into focus. I was hesitant to contribute a new story because my experiences are so trivial compared to what people such as JR’s husband, Jeff, and TC are going though. I can’t even begin to fathom such pain.
Here is the story anyway: last week I went to a local hospital in order to have an Extracorporeal Shock Wave Lithotripsy (ESWL) procedure for kidney stones. I was forced to stay overnight because the urologic surgical center would not perform the procedure unless I had someone spending the night with me. There are no incisions for this procedure and there is no reason to have intimate exposure. The patient lays on a special table and the instrument is brought up and touches the patient’s unclothed flank. The flank access is accomplished by wearing a standard gown and opening the back once on the table. In addition, the patient is covered with a blanket. The only other piece of equipment is a real-time imaging machine which allows the doctor to focus the sound waves on the kidney stone.
Previously, I had asked my urologist for an all-male team, but that was when I was going to have a cystoscopy performed as well. We canceled the cystoscopy so the gender of the surgical team was a moot point.
When I checked in, the nurse gave me the “everything off” speech and I questioned it because of the nature of my procedure. She insisted that it was hospital policy and since there should not have been any exposure, I decided not to fight the issue and completely undressed. Sometime after I woke up, I noticed that I was no longer wearing the paper gown I started with and was now dressed in blue fabric gown. This was very concerning as I wondered how they actually changed my gown. I would like to think that they placed the blue gown on top of me and then slid the paper gown out from under the blue gown thus avoiding any intimate exposure and preserving my personal modesty and dignity. For sake of expediency, I believe the actual process involved someone stripping the gown off of me thus exposing me to the entire surgical team, equipment representatives and anyone else who strolled into the operating theater. At some point, I was covered with the blue gown. Thinking about the gown caused a “mini-PTSD flashback” and I became very upset and even shed a few tears. I came very close to walking out of the hospital before being discharged but was talked down by a really wonderful nurse and stayed the night and was discharged at noon the next day.
EM
Dr. Bernstein
Part 2 of 2.
Today, I delivered a letter to the hospital coordinator reviewing my stay at the hospital and gave feedback on what went right and what was wrong. I discussed how upset I am about the unnecessary exposure and suggested that the hospital change its policies for procedures not needing intimate access.
I explained that in the last couple of years I have had eyelid surgery, nose reconstruction surgery, umbilical hernia surgery, rotator cuff repair surgery, carpal tunnel surgery, and three foot surgeries all while wearing my underwear. I also provided an information sheet on the COVR garment and how it would eliminate concern over unnecessary intimate exposure and result in a superior experience for the patient.
I also let her know that I will probably need another ESWL or even an ureteroscopy with laser lithotripsy procedure to address my kidney stone issue in the near future. However, because of the unnecessary exposure, I will avoid using this hospital for future treatment. It will be interesting to see if I even get a response and will the prospect of losing money cause any changes to occur.
I also commented on the intimate exposure of my roommate who was probably suffering from dementia and did not know where he was. There was very little concern for pulling the curtains and myself and anyone walking past the door would have seen him naked using a urinal. This was more his wife’s doing but I probably should have suggested using the curtains. I don’t know if the nonchalant attitude was due to simply him being an old man or because he did not have the mental awareness of what was happening.
This blog has been a very positive experience and has helped many people, but I would certainly understand if you are ready for a well-deserved break and choose to retire the blog.
EM
EM. I am very curious what kind of reply you get. Im sure we all know it will be the standard BS format letter of Im sorry we didnt meet your expectations. If this happens is there anyway to have a face to face with someone over their head? Sometimes i think these letter do nothing because we are anonymous to them. Face to face may have more of an impact. Cat.
EM I don’t know what facility you had your procedure done but they obviously follow the same protocols as the one I have been to that believes the only good patient is a naked patient. Depending on the patients are not always required to remove their underwear or may be provided with paper underwear. I have not heard of the facilities that allow underwear when feasible having higher rates of infection or death , especially in cases like yours where there is no incision ? You are never informed of any exposure and if you ask about the need for underwear removal the final answer is it is our policy take it or leave it. You are just another cog in the wheel and there is another soul to fill the blank you created in the schedule. I wish you all the luck. I have resigned myself to hoping that what ever takes me out is quick because I refuse to die without dignity
Cat
I will let the blog know of the response I get, if any. I am not really expecting much, but I feel better when I address the problem. The idea of an in-person discussion is an interesting one. I will want to take my COVR garment in case they have never seen one. I will have to wait and see what kind of response I get.
Jeff,
I live in Florida and I ended up at a large networked facility called HCA Florida. Unlike my recent ESWL procedure, all of my surgeries were I was allowed to wear underwear occurred at doctor owned surgical centers. I wish I had left my underwear on because they might not have even realized I was wearing underwear until the procedure was over. Of course, maybe the positioning they did while I was awake was for my benefit and as soon as I was sedated they might have removed the gown. I hate being sedated and not knowing what really goes on.
I am sure my life is going to get interesting since various procedures like urodynamic testing, cystoscopy, and prostate ultrasound could likely be in my future. After explaining my modesty issues with my urologist, he added a line to my chart that says "Patient does not want female staff touching him". Not sure how things will work since I don't think my urologist employs a male nurse.
EM
EM I relayed a story on Quora this week about a woman that was visiting our home and the topic came up about how long a Doctor should continue to practice and a urologist came up that we were all familiar with and the last anyone had heard he was still practicing well into his 80’s. She proceeded to tell a story from 40 years earlier when she went to drop off some results (she is a Sonographer) the doctor was out of the office and all the girls were at the front desk laughing it up and the woman asked if they were having a party ? They told her they laughing because the patient that had just left had the biggest penis of all the previous patients and showed her a log they were keeping of all the men’s sizes. My wife saw the look on my face and knowing how I felt about things like that asked her not to say any more. As it turns out I had visited this Doctor around the same time frame in my 20.s and couldn’t help but wonder if I was on that list? Is this an example of what we are told that they are all professionals. This is just one firsthand example of what goes on in the background and except for my retelling the world will never know how badly those men were being violated by people we are told to trust . This is coming out of my little world. How many similar stories are out there that have never seen the light of day?
Dr. B.,
It's JR. Can you delete the previous post as it was posted before it was finished? Thanks, JR
TC.,
I don't think Dr. B. was referring you to me for counseling as he knows I do not have a license. However, it does help to listen and/or talk with others who have shared experiences which is why I assume you are here. For us, Archie helped us in not only making us feel we weren't alone but in helping us navigate the medical waters. Even though nothing came of it, we learned a great deal and it is because there are really no viable avenues of recourse for harmed patients is why I am doing the weekly radio broadcast to educate patients.
I understand your anger because I still have a great deal of anger which I again use to do the radio broadcast. However, I have seen you belittle some here on this blog who have tried to help you. As an middle-aged/older, plain woman who has seen and learned a thing or two it is counter productive to take your anger/rage out on fellow victims.
As far as your HIPAA complaint, I could have told you it was a huge waste of time. Not all medical records have to be released especially if there are mental health notes within it. It took the OCR 5 years to answer our complaint and their answer was they weren't going to investigate. DUH!!! As far as your PCP being on your side, it appears to me she is merely telling you what she believes you need to hear to get you out of her office or out of communication with her. PCPs really don't have the time to personally care about patients.
JR, I think you deleted the recent posting yourself. Your last posting was June 8th. 5 days ago which I assume you want preserved. ..Maurice.
Dr. B.,
Yes, keep the post from 5 days ago. Today when I was writing a response, I pressed the enter bar and it just disappeared so I assumed it posted. Thanks for checking and getting back to me. Although we don't always agree, I do appreciate your dedication and willingness to host this blog as it does serve an important function not only for those present but for those who in the future will be harmed by how medical care was delivered to them.
I found this article from a Patient Safety site on FB and thought it was interesting. In fact, I think Cindy and I will talk about it on one of our upcoming shows.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/health/other/im-an-icu-doctor-when-i-needed-a-liver-transplant-i-learned-how-vulnerable-it-is-to-be-a-patient/ar-BB1o27mq?fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAR0ozDxUcNDV9-xnx-U_-taOam0XeSXW7Qf20y7L9i3YSWCWm01_c-zc9hg_aem_ZmFrZWR1bW15MTZieXRlcw
It seems us ordinary patients are not the only ones that have these feelings: "As a doctor, I'm used to being in control. As a patient, I had very little control. I lost my independence and felt vulnerable. Sometimes, laying in a hospital bed with even my clothes taken away, I felt I had no dignity." Sadly, though it does take a patient experience for many of them to realize what is happening to thousands and thousands of patients on a daily basis. While progress in medicine might have been made, it seems the human side of how that medicine is being delivered has maybe went backwards. Archie has said many times that all medical people should be in the patient's position and I would have to agree.
As I have written here in the past, on two separate occasions when I was being admitted from the emergency room to my final hospital bedroom and even though the nurses knew I was a physician, they insisted to take a photograph of my naked back to buttocks, pulling apart the gown in the back and I had no chance to reject. They just took the picture, which I feel, now,was for legal value since I would be most of the time while in bed, lying on my back where pressure lesions were possible. I was feeling very ill at the time and I had no response to my concerns about the value of taking such a picture.
This is my example of a known physician as a patient, in this case, a "victim" of a legal protocol. So this is my personal example of what you last posted. ..Maurice.
The story about the doctor as patient and Dr. Bernstein's experience reminded me of when I was first evaluated for kidney stone removal via ureteroscopy. I expressed my concerns and embarrassment about being placed in the lithotomy position and completely exposed with a mixed sex surgical team. My urologist was patronizing me and downplaying my concerns and I finally asked. "You have never had this procedure done to you, have you". He sort of stuttered and said "Uhh No". I replied "That's what I thought. I want you to remember our conversation so in 20 years or so and you are on the other side of the desk, you might understand how I feel"
My current urologist is trying to honor my request for no women during intimate procedures. I recently had a hormone replacement treatment where pellets are inserted under the skin on your hip/butt. He asked if it was okay for his nurse to participate and learn since she was replacing a nurse that was leaving the practice. I am not modest about showing a butt check and agreed to her participation and really appreciated that he asked me. I probably have more testing in my future and it will be interesting to see if there are male personnel for a urodynamics study and will he perform a cystoscopy unassisted. If I have to have a ureteroscopy with laser lithotripsy, I wonder how many of the usual 5 member surgical team can be male. I really need to make sure and thank him for asking at my next appointment.
Jeff, My first scrotal ultrasound was performed by a female sonographer. Everything about the exam was professional and my modesty/dignity was respected as much as possible. However, when I dressed and left the exam room, the sonographer and receptionist were laughing and giggling when they looked at me. I have always wondered if the merriment was unrelated and coincidental.
EM
Until doctors, nurses, and other healthcare staff are the patients themselves, they really can't understand the patient perspective, and even then they might not given their knowledge base of what is going on is likely greater than that of typical patients.
Particularly telling of how out of touch many healthcare staff are is the all too frequent response from female staff to male patient complaints of needless exposure or female staff for intimate matters is their having had a male OB/GYN deliver their child. Guys are complaining about medical assistants standing there staring or their being exposed for no apparent reason and the female staff are equating an MD doing a necessary procedure with the unnecessary presence of a medical assistant. They are offended that some male patients don't like being put on display for no good reason.
Dr. B.,
Even though you understand what the picture was for does not justify how it was done. Merely telling someone something needs to be done is not consent especially when it comes to an intimate part of their body. If a man says he is going to have sex with a woman and before she can refuse he actually carries through, it is called assault. It doesn't matter that you have given your consent, the fact is they violated your rights and they actually assaulted you. You as with any other patient has the right to question the ownership of the device used and even the right of refusal. You mentioned those nurses knew you were an MD so I believe this is their standard way of doing things that is to say they don't wait for patient consent. I would also add that because of your "advanced" age, maybe they thought it didn't matter because as I was told that older patients should just get used to being "exposed".
This would be a prime case for you to talk with the hospital and remind them how important patient consent is even though you understand the value of the picture to help verify the integrity of your skin. In fact, with your permission, I believe this is a good story for my radio broadcast. Of course, I would use no identifying information. However, I will extend the invitation to you if you want to come on the show yourself. Again, you don't have to identify yourself if you don't want. Please let me know if you have any objections to your story being as I will respect your decision but I do believe it is a valuable one because regardless of you knowing why it is was done and you may not have had any objection to the exposure, it was done nonetheless without your consent which is a major violation.
JR, I give you permission to present to your participants the text of my blog thread message which I just published here and, of course, suggesting that they also write their comments also to this blog thread. By the way, all this happened to me in the last decade of my 93 years. ..Maurice.
All of us here understand the underlying demographics of healthcare and the often insurmountable obstacles that poses for males who want only male staff. This was just made visually apparent here locally with a photo in the newspaper of the local hospital's OR nursing staff that had received a DAISY Award; that being a national award recognizing excellence in nursing. The entirety of the hospital's OR nursing staff was in the photo..... 11 women and 1 man. That being the case, the odds that even a single male, other than possibly the surgeon, will be in the OR for any given surgery are not very high. 2 of those OR nurses live in my hamlet which speaks to the reality that anonymity is anything but assured in small settings such as this. I'm not suggesting these OR nurses ever violate HIPAA but rather it poses potential awkwardness for patients when they interact with the nursing staff in the community.
Biker I can’t imagine living in a small enough community that I could possibly run into the women that deceived and ambushed me on more than one surgical occasion. I have still not overcome the emotional harm that was done to me and I do acknowledge that a large percentage of people have the ability to switch gears in a medical setting yet still close the door when using the bathroom to avoid having a woman seeing them exposed? This transition is accomplished by a magical switch that medical professionals receive in their training that allows a woman to expose and touch a man intimately (ie urinary catheter) and never bat an eye or make any judgements about what she is looking at? At the same time the patient is expected to possess this same switch about his feelings and if that becomes a problem he is the problem. The fact that there is a complete imbalance in gender is never addressed it is easier to shift the paradigm. And as far as that magical switch goes and the sheer amount violations that have been committed against patients I would say that switch is eligible for a lemon law recall
TC reply to JR
Part 1 of 2
It all started with Archie. I ripped him because he was persistently throwing directly to me, foolishly idealistic, Pollyanna nonsense -- out of with reality -- & he simply wouldn't stop after I told him to STOP. Continuing, he advised me to have "Antifa" protests on my front lawn. No front lawn here, & if I did it wouldn't change things in this uneducated, ultraconservative desert, "Antifa" is a dirty word (though it means anti-Fascist & I'm against fascism)
Then Banterings upped his own stupidity ante by suggesting that I pay homeless people to picket the medical facilities. Do I have to spell out why & jow that's simply too over the top, tactless, out of touch, simply inappropriate? I had just been homeless myself, & if I could pay homeless people, the picket would be mocked by onlookers who have better worries than surgical underwear removal.
Sorry JR, Archie's random musings & suggestions off the top of his head, hadn't a shred of realistic, intellectual honesty present.
So what happened JR? You attacked me for calling out Bantering's lack of intellectual honesty (& that's what it is!, I'm just being honest). Grasping at straws to find a basis to attack me, you then took me out of context by "callimg me out on my bullshit" when I presumably said that patients shouldn't tell their doctors they were sexually abused. You were taking me out of context as you usually do. In fact, I had observed that it's risky to present yourself as an abuse victim, because it can trigger worries that you may be some drama queen, prone to making false accusations. This is especially true if you ask for special modesty accommodations, as that approach backfired for me in pain clinics.
So I had to explain myself, & went on a counterattack & because not only were you were so aggressively attacking me on behalf of Archie, & you displayed a poor contextual grasp of matters.
Then Cat openly attacked me unsolicited. To paraphrase what she said, "it's no wonder our providers don't take us seriously with patients like TC acting the way he does here. She qualified nothing, but clearly it could only be in defense of how I exploded to Archie's incessant verbal diarrhea directed at me. (Directed elsewhere I could ignore it!)
I PMed Maurice with photos of my trailer before & after my bout with homelessness that drive me to a failed suicide attempt, & swollen knee, a photo of my trailer living room to show the squalor I'm forced to live in because of my loss of mobility, & he writes me back about "clinical that needs to be addressed? I openly gave that idea of therapy the middle finger here (not you?) because I strongly.look at it as a QUALITY Of LIFE issue. I attempted suicide last year because I was a victim of extreme poverty, no SS COLA increases because bankers & corporations are actively lootng our SS fund, a victim of homelessness due to cruel zoning laws prohibiting living in trailers outside of designated trailer parks; a victim of greedy speculation & hedge funds, the Airbnb industry, making rent unaffordable & putting us & myself on the street! I am also a victim of a orthopedists that neglected to fix a meniscus tear got infinitely worse after sleeping the whole Summer in my car, & walking around on a badly swollen leg & expanding the meniscus tear that now may represent too much meniscus loss to salvage the joint! For a whole year, I've been in shutdown, unable to get organized & care for myself. I present Dr Bernstein with photographic evidence of all this, & he diagnosed me "serious clinical & psychological symptoms"? Instead of acknowledging it as a QUALITY OF LIFE MATTER, he.put the honus on me (the victim) to address a "mental illness" that clinicians fabricate for their livelihood & egos, instead of putting the blame on our corrupt society (they can't fix) where it belongs.
TC reply to JR (part 2 of 2)
I also vehemently rebutted the idea that a person committing suicide is somehow doing a spiritual wrong, as Reginald & others implied, on the basis that the sky spook they pray to is offended by it. They say "life is precious". But have they seen predatory animals eat alive innocent prey? And people aren't similarly preyed upon by others? Clearly our lives aren't valued if we are treated like shit most of our lives. Then when we've had enough pain & misery & decide to self-euthanize, all of a sudden our lives become "precious" for a minute or so.
Isn't this group supposed to be about patient self autonomy, having control over ones own body & fate? But quite ironically, in the face of self euthanization, an ultimate act of self-autonomy, this group has demonstrated as much pushback as we all get from our doctors!
In my dismissal to treat my situation from a MH perspective, and a religious perspective, I gave a good enough account of being trapped into a very low quality of life. Human interaction? No suitable options. My brain is hardwired so that I cannot have platonic interactions outside of performing musically. Johnny Carson was exactly the same way as a performer. He had NO friends & social life outside of his performing. The difference (of course) is that he was way better at what he did than I.
Again, in my account of my present situation, having very little to live for, or forward to, I made it clear that romance is not an option, because (again) I'm not actively performing in a cultured environment, & that I have NO SEXUAL interest in middle aged soccer moms, or even young women that aren't generically pretty. It's not a conscious decision as much as a natural visceral reaction.
That triggered from you a description of yourself as "plain & middle aged". JR why inject yourself into my self- described romantic limitations that can't be met. How is this all of a sudden "about you" & again , taking my words out of context, & inappropriately using it as a guise for one of your passive aggressive attacks? After that, how can you have any credibility left here?
In anger I mischaracterized my PCP. She has twice extricated herself from corporate funding & corporate medical micromanaging & meddling, for the benefit of her patients. She gets paid monthly for her phone visits with me, but I message her on the patient portal at least 2x per day & get responses. She's been like a Girl Friday giving me every referral, rest & medication I've asked for until she barked in doing two consecutive back MRIs because she anticipated pushback from Medicare & believed any socialist could read any MRI.
She was frantically trying to talk to my present pain doctor, to the extent she told her assistant once he's on the phone to call her out of the room with her patient so she could talk to him. He had just cancelled the 06/27 stem block, indicating he dumped me as his patient. Though the upcoming 06/18 TPI is still on, quite surprisingly.
In sum, when a person presents himself suffering from sociopolitical inequality, hopeless poverty & intractable pain (the back is destroyed) the knee has totally crippled me for a year, & the joint maybe unsalvageable ) address the issue ON HIS TERMS. It's beyond insulting & condescending to morph his poor quality of life into something a therapist or psychiatric pill peddler should treat. I am not a weak impressionable teenager, & have too much self insight to buy into that. If I wanted psychological help, I would present it to this group as such, instead of the incurable medical & socioeconomic issue it is. I DON'T NEED THAT "HELP" as you call it. It is as I sumting as Archie's "help". You do not want to condescend to me, I will unapologetically rip you to shreds
Similarly, if I were asking for spiritual advice I go to a rabbi, Shaman, priest, Guru, or ask the group for spiritual help. But again, I know better! No priest, Eabbi, Guru, or such, has a hotline to Heaven. Anyone who claims that is a fool, a liar, or both. So in what context can would I care that he believes that suicide is some mortal sin-- & by saying he disapproves of self euthanasia he is blindly making that assumption.
Where is everybody? An early summer vacation from all medical concerns about one's dignity is evident here. A vacation is good. ..Maurice.
Dr. B.,
As far as myself, those concerns over bodily dignity and autonomy being violated doesn't take a vacation as you never know when they will be violated. I imagine it is quiet for another reason.
I have been corresponding with a lady who is an advocate for in the world of misdiagnosis as her son almost died. Here's part 11 of an article that I found very interesting:
https://helenemepstein.substack.com/p/i-dont-know-part-2?r=iwfrn&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAR3pDPvgHyCvN-3PJf0LCDLVyDUkIOedttnlFny4z6qt083K9CrgyUP60qI_aem_-xWmyW8LbjPqBtmJKTrRrA&triedRedirect=true
I do believe that many of us are misdiagnosed. I believe it is because the medical community has become a conveyor belt in the delivery of medicine. Many times we are subjected to a wide variety of tests and medicines that either do nothing or may even do harm. I have found that doctors rarely admit they simply don't know.
Not specifically a dignity matter but something I found interesting and thought I would pass along nonetheless. For a routine follow-up appt an RN roomed me rather than a medical assistant. Not sure why and I didn't think it would be polite to ask so I didn't. She went through the same kinds of questions, taking blood pressure etc. that a medical asst. does, but she understood the answers I gave rather than medical assistants just mindlessly keying it in. And that caused her to ask follow-up questions as she thought appropriate, and I could see her mind whirling almost as if she was doing her own diagnosis. She was talking to me as if I were her patient and it made it all just feel more respectful and professional.
Dr. B,
As JR said, the concerns for dignity and modesty don’t take a vacation, but my focus changes depending on the immediacy of potential intimate exposure.
Even when something is not eminent, I never really stop thinking about what happened in the past and constantly play out potential future scenarios in my mind over and over again. I sometimes question my resolve and wonder to what extremes I am willing to go to. The thought process can get exhausting and can take a backseat when considering the overall state of the world and how it affects my future.
I also try to understand what upsets me so much and what could be done to alleviate my concerns. For me, trust is a major factor and I often think I could more readily accept opposite sex intimate care if I had time to develop a relationship with caregivers. Of course, surgical procedures are one-off and repeated contact would only work in an office setting.
I recently had a KUB x-ray to evaluate how successful my ESWL procedure was. It appears that the one stone that could be targeted was dusted. It is yet to be determined if an additional ESWL procedure might be possible or if I will need to submit to an ureteroscopy procedure. If an ureteroscopy is in my future, my fears and nervousness will be kicked into high gear and I will probably have more to comment on as I try to secure same-sex medical personnel. In addition, I may also need some type of diagnostic (Urodynamics, Cystoscopy, or Urocuff) procedure to diagnose BPH symptoms which will also cause plenty of distress and exacerbate my need to vent.
I haven’t heard anything from the Chief Nursing Officer at the hospital where I had my ESWL performed but have recently received another online request for me to complete a survey about my experience. The survey email was signed by the Chief Executive Officer so I have decided to write her and share the previously written letter just to see if I get a response.
EM
TC here. Part 1 of 2.
Unfortunately I'm not even jaundiced, I went through the motions of a liver function test, afraid to get the results saying I'm ok. Don't want that.
The hyaluronic acid shots made my knees so much worse, & I'm fearful if my left Achilles tendon. Problem is that the knee surgeon felt compelled to inject the "right " amount of hyaluronic acid in three consecutive weekly injections, rather than say, a 3/4 hyaluronic acid, 1/4 steroids over a period of weeks.
It's well documented the initial harm viscosupplementation causes w/o steroids concurrently used. But this asshole didn't care. When I asked for a steroid injection he said I always do things to be different, that is until he saw my knee the following week. He then said I have to wait a month for the steroid injection. A month is Just 4th, so I'll have to wait until the 11th. By then he'll probably recommend open Achilles surgery & a boot fur 3 months, & that will only trigger my home carbon monoxide poisoning remedy. I will not live much longer with this.
The thoracic TPI had minimal benefits, I'm SOL there. I have a lumbar "stem block coming up on 07/18, I still don't know if the pain dic will yield to my demand of doing all lumbars instead of just 4 & 5, stupid asshole! L1 L2 & L3 really need cortisone.
What's keeping me active now is 100 mg of Prednisone per day, & it's putting my Achilles heel at risk for rupture. I can't live in squalor much longer. It's futhy her & stinks. I don't even have sewage & must bag my human waste & drive it to the dump.
I'm preparing a significant post for here that must be carefully written.
Here a bombshell that might compromise my credibility here. But Cat has confessed as a nurse she has had voyeuristic proclivities (ok were all human & that's here point?) Any therapist can tell you, the fantasies are somehow "healing" fantasies in response to unwanted, undeserved, unsolicited sexual trauma,.
Anybody here abused in childhood or adolescence by providers, ever had they developed unwanted medical fetish proclivities later in life from the trauma.
I'll be honest. My pediatrician's morbid interest in my private areas warped me sexually. That bent towards exhibitionism & sexual humiliation permeated my childhoid sexual fantasies up to a point. Then I lost my virginity at age 9 to my cousin, who was a gorgeous blond 10 on a scale of 1 to 10. Then we were caught, badly beaten, & had to be stealthy. Then at age 13, my cousin initiated a sexual encounter with me (she was always the aggressor) & in the middle of the encounter got turned off at my average sized maan part, & became a lesbian at that instant. (she was always a world class athletic Tomboy.) We kept a close platonic relationship until she graduated, enlisted as a West point cadet, & became the first female kicked out for being a homosexual. She went on to be a sociopath.
I went into HS with high so ial status thanks to my trumpet playing. I lost that "mojo" at the end of my freshman year (an ill-advised embouchure change by a controlling teacher) & not having good social skills, my status & options diminished. I was eclipsed by my alpha male friends, particularly one who had great social skills, a very articulate, devious, manipulative bullshit artist. He was as witty as Robin Williams, as good an insulting artist as Don Rickles (in the early stages I encouraged rough insulting humor from him). He seemed to have several issues with me. His parents divorced, & he was poor. Mostly it waa envy of my being an only child & seeming spoiled, & not knowing how abused I was. Only one issue I can take responsibility for.
TC conclusion part 3 of 3As for my RL medical encounters that got weird. I did nothing outwardly to solicit them. But I can imagine that done if those lady providers might have been picking up on cravung a vibe I was emitting . They seemed shocked when I resisted them & refused to undress furthermore or let them undress me. They were still acting on authority, taking advantage, I wasn't, & was shocked
TC.
TC. I have not a nurse. I work in the lab. I'm not blind. Not others in healthcare seem to want us to think. Cat
TC here:
Cat I remember your writing something's to the effect that prior to working in medical billing, you were in the ER or something (?) , notice naked guys. Undressed with your eyes those who were clothed. Then went home telling your husband the others were insignificant to you. I'm paraphrasing & going from memory, & this is not an attack on you at all, is it wrong?
I wrote three parts, & Dr B mercifully omitted the middle part 2, as I went far too much into personal details about how my experiences on the exam table (ages 2-10) warped me sexually. I'm not going into detail this time, other than to say lot of RL medical providers have medical fetishes, & shamefully encourage abuse of children as a way of life in the internet.
We're all human, but providers have the authority & abuse it whereas patients don't.
TC your memory doesn't work. 1) i am not in medical billing, i work in the lab, im an MLS. 2) i did my internship for Phlebotomy in the ER. I was 20 that was 35 yrs ago and not married. 3) as a heterosexual woman of course i notice naked men. That was the whole fucking point. Put a naked guy in front of me now and ill still look. If its Jason Mamoa all the better. Yes, if a good looking guy walks past me on the street. I look. Do i tell.my husband? What kind of idiot are you? All it proves is im human. Humans look. You cant stop it no matter what you say. Cat
Cat states the fundamental truths that few who work in healthcare will admit. The most bizarre aspect of it all are the sheer number of patients that believe the healthcare industry's stance that donning scrubs renders healthcare staff asexual. We're all human. We all look and we all judge. Most patients aren't anything special, positive or negative,and as "more of the same" might not receive more than a casual glance, but staff does look so as to render that judgment.
I would much prefer honesty in their acknowledgment that they look and judge, but that they keep those judgments to themselves and do not let it affect the care they give.
Biker. Why would you assume vaste numbers think medical workers are asexual? The surveys limit what a patient can even say. PoJFssibly a large number doesn't greatly care. A certain number are happy about it and large numbers avoid care.
I say that large numbers of people believe the healthcare mantra that healthcare is gender neutral and purely clinical because they have heard it so many times that they have come to believe it. We here are a minority voice that see it differently.
Go on Quora and you'll see a never ending stream of female nurses & other healthcare workers saying that in their 30 year career never once have they ever needlessly exposed a patient nor do they know anyone who ever did. Never once in their 30 year career have they viewed a patient through a sexual lens nor do they know anyone who has. A penis is no different to them than an elbow. They don't look. They don't notice. And many believe them.
They talk about having had a male doctor for their child's delivery but then go silent when asked about male chaperones, male CNA's giving them bed baths or shower assists, male nurses giving them catheters, male mammographers, etc. They go silent when asked about their co-workers, including the males being their caregivers. And few call them out on the hypocrisy.
I think it comes down to the general public wanting to believe healthcare is gender neutral and purely clinical. They don't have to expect dignified care that way.
And the large numbers avoiding care? Who are THOSE people? Although there's also large numbers avoiding care because of the COST. JF
TC documentation of weird office, sexual shenanigans part 1. (Stay tuned, this IS amusing.)
Yes Cat my memory does work & you just openly confirmed everything I remember, except one rather insignificant detail you left out from the start, that you were a ER phlebotomist (same as a MA) while saw naked guys) & you have the nerve to call ME the idiot?
From the start you appeared out of nowhere & attacked me. Obviously just defending Archie, with whom I wanted to discontinue any if his senseless 100% unrealistic, Polyanna musings DIRECTED AT ME (not the rest of you) not grounded enough in reality for serious discussion.) but you backed up your attack on me with ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. JR similarly declared war in me with a pretty randim, inarticulate , incoherent, unsubstantiated attack on me in defense of Archie. With both of you I had NEVER any prior dialogue! . At least I can string together lucid, articulate, coherent posts & observations, I back up. How about you?
As I had said several times Cat, THIS WASN'T AN ATTACK ON YOU in accurately recalling what you wrote many months ago It was a bit of a preamble, a confession to having my own sexual proclivities, brought on by bizarre RL experiences with nurses, who seemed to be acting out my subconscious medical fetish scripts if they were reading my mind. (Of course being the vulnerable patient, the humiliation fantasies are driven by fear & inverting past negative sexual trauma I to something positive.)
As you all know, I encountered blatant abuse from a 50+ BU urologist in 1976.
June 1990 I was skeptical of a pain doc's claim that an inguinal cortisone injections help, so he urged me to see a urologist to confirm the treatments efficacy. (Bad idea to see any urologist) I should have refused, but went to an El Cajon, CA urologist. Another 50ish old square dude like the BUMC perv that molested me in '76.
Upon arrival I was greeted at the door by hys geeky 40+ secretary/medical assistant. Not someone attractive & datable, but someone in my CFNM humiliation fantasies. (If I had the dating options I want, I wouldn't act out & abuse myself sexually in my fantasy world.
Really troubled & angered by knowing I'd be exposed to another 50+ male utologist, & down right homophobic about it, I thought to myself, "too bad she's not the one getting the peep show, & not him. (Of course in my wildest dreams I didn't think it could happen, given I was there just for advise, confirmation that ilioinguinal blocks actually work!)
(cont)
TC
Weird office shenanigans part 2
The urologist (alone with me in the room) told me he'd have to do a cursory exam (yeah, to justify the $168 bill in 1990 dollars). He said the assistant will take my vitals, after which I should strip to my shorts. Shirt off to listen to my heart.
The geeky assistant smiled, took my blood pressure, then ordered, "everything off from the waist down!" Then didn't leave the room! She turned to the side, playing with, & shuffling my scanty 2 page med record as if it were substantial, significant & relevant to her! . I did nothing. She looked at me surprised, I did nothing, and she orders me again, everything off from the waist down!" (Confused I couldn't understand. Obvious she wasn't needed to assist after taking the vitals, & then contradicting the docs specific orders to take off my shirt, leave the underwear on.)
She had the demeanor of a dingbat, looked at me nearly crosseyed to see me still dressed where she just wasn't medically needed & she rips a long piece of the exam table paper off & handed it to me all crumpled up & sets, "you can cover yourself up with this" then turns to play with my two page record, turns to me as if to say "why are you still dressed" & finally leaves.
Believe it or not, I was raised such a polite, mommy's boy pussy, that but was INCOMPREHENSIBLE to me that she expected me to undress there -- until after she left. Then it sunk in. And being 32 going on 12 I was starting to get a sharp erection, & was concerned that it would persist fur the crest of visit. Then in the next room, I heard the violent thumping against an exam table, frantic nut incomprehensible bumbling of two male baritones, with the assistants very sharp distinct voice above the chaos saying to the patient, "ARE YOU NERVOUS? ARE YOU NERVOUS? DINT BE NERVOUS!" (What sort of shit was going on there?
The urologist came in without her. It's only a guess how much he knew or approved of her efforts to give her a private striptease.
At age 32 This was my first direct encounter at s med facility with any nurse, outside of grade school. Then (1990)& ever since my patient demeanor has been stoic, passive focused on the malady I want fixed, & I don't smile (never anything to smile about for decades).
In return I"ve a avoided most medical cars, rarely put myself in thuse positions, but sporadically have gotten really weird shit from nurses & MAs that I still can't fathom in my mind. Another ambush incident in late August 1990 with my 37 year old pain LaMesa CA doc's nurse, that actually led to another 2022 ambush incident at the same LA Mesa Hospital with another assistant when he was 69 (& should've retired!)
TC weird nurse experienced Part 3
Summer of 1990 I had three blocks, an ilioinguinal, a genitofemoral (made it much worse) & then in August, a double dose ilioinguinal.
The first ilioinguinal, late June, I was SO relieved that it was a quick one minute shot, just the pain doc, no male or female nurse or MA hanging around. I left thinking, SANITY PREVAILED, & OF COURSE! NO DECENT DOCTOR WOULD PUT ME IN DISPLAY! (Boy was I niave, & I did not go there scripting in my mind any funny business. I went scared, vulnerable & intimidated like most people.
The last block, in August 1990.came after a terrible genitofemoral block in July, I threatened suicide.
This time, I came to the LA Mesa CA hospital (no name here) where the pain doc did his pain management in the basement where all the hospital coat hangers were kept. (Really ragtag.)
It was dead, no other patients, & after having had two blocks with no dignity infringements, feeling no "medfet" scripts in the back of my mind as a defense mechanism, a weeble shaped nurse with a bowl hairvut showed me to a curtained cubical. She asked what I'm there for, & I said, "a shot in the groin". She goes "a shot in the groin?" I guess we have to get you out of your clothes (she apparently expected to personally put me into a gown as if I'm helpless, & I refused it, & she seemed put off!
The cubical also had a stainless steel tray beside the gurney full of stainless steeke instruments including a patella hammer, the rest I didn't recognize.
For this injection my pants were down, I got a quick shot, then the pain duc left the cubical to reload his syringe. Not long before the weeble shaped nurse barged in (w/o the docs knowledge) grabbed an instrument from the tray mumbling excuse me!
It was dead downstairs in that hospital. No other patients! Nothing compelling that nurse to randomly grab an instrument from the tray with such a sense of urgency--as if it's the only instrument if its kind!
I thought I was doing the nurse a favor fur not narcing her out to her boss & getting her written up. I always derived a sense of comfort in that pain docs respect io my modesty -- so I thought.
Then the pain returned in 2021,& there were three visits at that same hospital with the same doc: 12/06/21; 01/06/22 & 03/08/22.
TC
Yes TC you are. Since when is a phlebotomist the same as an MA? Do you know what a phleb even is? Sounds like you dont. If you are this much of a jerk to everyone you encounter its no surprise nobody wants to deal with you. I highly doubt you are as nice as you claim to be. Grow up.
TC's weird medical experiences part 4
12/06/21 i arrive at the same LA Mesa Hospital to be reunited with the old doc after 31 years, but now working upstairs away from the coat hangers. Immediately in the lobby I was confronted with, "what's your birthdate". Again, another confrontational from another staff, "what's your birthdate?" The next I perceived as a a disrespectful assault: "what's your birthdate". I exploded, & a security guard rushed towards me!
Next I was greeting down the hallway by the pain docs 26 year old CNRA, gggeneric, like about a 1000 other generically curvy, Mexican American nurses in SoCal hospitals. (Not on my dating or CFNM radar, just not my culture, but a smart, personable nurse.)
She asked me two times, what's my birthdate, & I said, "for christ sakes you have my id, & the doctor knows me back 30 years. I was taken to a Catscan room (where they'd do the pain stuff that day) with a hairy bearded 30+ Catscan tech just hanging out with nothing to do.
I was angry & complained to the CRNA about having to repeat my birthdate so many times, as disrespectful treatment. Sitting close beside me on the table, she told the catscan tech to put me on his computer screen, then she orders me, "tell him you're birthdate..., Tell him your birthdate........., Tell him your birthdays. Not amusing, i was genuinely getting pissed. That promoted her to give me tightly squeezed, an unsolicited one armed hug.
She leaves, the anesthesiology pain dicy talks to me, then instructs me to just lower my elastic waistband far enough to expose the area for the injection (improvement over taking down the pants in 1990). I tell him. "what's wrong with this picture? We're doing an intimate procedure, & that tech is still in the room. I don't even use urinals in men's rooms! Get him out!
So the hairy ape leaves, & the senile pain dic injects me in the waste 1 1/2 injected above & to the right of the usual left lateral scar edge. -- a bad TPI that made everything worse.
TC
TC, I agree with you in that I will not under any circumstance give my birth date to anyone. In medical situations I hand the a business card with my name and on the back side there is my chart number. End of discussion. Thelab wants me to spell my first and last manes, date of birth etc. I ask to see the paper work and say it is corect.However most of the time I do say it is incorrect as my middle initial is omitted. I have always used my full name with middle initial since 1964, If a problem, I just state I am not a 12 year old boy and make them retype everything including tags for the vials. According to HIPA there are 31 ways to establish your identity. Using date of birth is the cheapest way to create the illusion of a false security system instead of investing in and indivisible prime number security system. Too important to save money and shell it into corporate profits or pay increases to top excs. Before anyone leaps to their computer, please don't waste your time as I have had this discussion with a 42 year career hospital CEO, some leading doctors on the east coast and a former client of mine who was head of a think tank in NYC which specialized in creating prime number security systems for corporations.
An important part of life is choosing your battles. Not everything is worth making a big deal out of. As a patient, giving my name and date of birth multiple times is not even on the list of issues I am concerned with. Each person in the chain does it as standard protocol to affirm they know which patient they are with. Better thorough upfront than sorry in arrears.
Another part of life that makes a difference in its overall quality is being gracious. While that includes things like being being polite & kind to those we interact with, an important piece is not lording power over others simply because we can. Any request or complaint that I have gets taken far more seriously as a result. Conversely I take requests and complaints far more seriously from people who are similarly gracious than I do from those who seemingly just want to find fault with everybody and everything.
Another aspect of this is that they people asking for name & date of birth are just doing their jobs as they have been directed to do. They have no choice in the matter. They are not the people to give a hard time over it. If you don't like that protocol, register a complaint with Patient Relations instead.
My duty to be polite ended in 1967 when I was brutally sodomized by a nasty female RN and female orderly, I have had serious discussions with chief of staff, directors of nursing and chief operating officers. Politeness never entered and people listened.If staff were supervised properly by management who knew how to fulfill their positions much of the nonsense would never happen. Politeness only goes so far and is a 2 way street. Attorneys also get attention. Patient relations? you might as well whistle "Dixie". I have yet to meet anyone in hospital management who is aware of the 31 ways to verify your identity and that includes CEOs.
I agree with Biker. My problem is with the policies and procedures in place not with the individual worker bee’s at the hospital or clinic. Being polite and reasonable with a well reasoned input goes a lot further. Personally, I’m more concerned with how the information I provide is controlled and who has access to it, rather than, as Biker has observed who asks for it. Doctors often ask us to be fully honest and that they will hold our concerns confidential. That’s all well and good and I sincerely believe they have our best interest at heart, however, our “confidential” revelations are then recorded and entered into an electronic health record and often virtually everyone in their office has access to it. I often commented before and will again, it’s amazing just how many people in the office have total access to my file. This has recently included those at testing and imaging offices where I was referred to. I understand they need access to some of my information to accomplish the tests but why notes? comments? medical history? I don’t consider myself to be especially fixated on privacy but with all we hear about computer breaches it is a genuine concern. It is almost to the point with me that I only tell a provider the minimum.
To All
I guess i am ready to concede defeat. I really thought that the management team of the hospital would at least send a form letter saying "Sorry your experience wasn't satisfactory to you....". It has been over 4 weeks since I wrote the Chief Nursing Officer and the CEO, both of whom are women. Why do they bother asking patients to complete a survey when it is apparent that they really don't care.
EM
@mitipoopulos being so fixed by nurses is a real attention getter. Can you please elaborate? (I'm a 60s child & so grateful I didn't have a hospital stay. I was aware then the really sick way they'd focus on people's privates for no legitimate reason. ) I hate them, though I have to say as an adult the nurses I've encountered were kinda doting towards me. But the history of nursing?
2021 was the tail end of the COVID paranoid thing, but the atmosphere at that hospital was like an airport , & probably enough of a red flag to promote me to exit ASAP. I'm still hurting from that bad TPI at the waste!
TC here
As for not blaming the individual fur vad hospital policies? The problem is the power trip. Countless times I called surgical facilities with concerns about unecessary intimate exposure, the OR nurses belligerently rationalized the unecessary practice: "sterilization!" Quick catheterization in case if anesthesia complications" impediment of tourniquet application!" (Other places encourage underwear because "male parts" are the thing that impedes gournequers. Those individuals aren't innocent, they defend underwear removal but they don't want to relinquish their power. They will fight you for it. & They do!
Same principle for rationalizing chaperones, "we have to defend ourselves from All those false accusations, so it's for our protection and YOURS as well! " No false accusations, but potential real accusations to cover up. They are wrong ideologically, and derive a sadistic, personally gratifying adrenaline rush from having that power over men, & feed off the significant pain caused to elderly men by gratuitously being exposed to 20 year old MAs
TC
Sorry Dr B, I didn't identify myself when I replied to Mitripopulos. I asked to elaborate on being sodomized. If he had a "routine" hospital enema forced on him, I would not challenge "sodomy" as hyperbolic. It IS sexual assault.
TC
TC- you really irritate me no end by saying my use of the word "sodomy" was hyperbolic". You were not there, you have never read the legal documents nor do you have a copy of 3 signed admissions to that legal charge. When you do not know what you are talking about and just expressing your gaseous opinion, please keep your mouth shut.
Dr. Bernstein and participants in the forum.
I recently said that I gave up on getting a response from the hospital where I had my ESWL performed. Yesterday, I received a letter with the response from the CEO of a regional hospital in central Florida that is part of a large hospital organization.
I had written a detailed letter about both the positives and negatives of my experience at her hospital. My chief complaints were the lack of private rooms and the requirement for total nudity under the gown particularly when the procedure requires no genital access. I expressed my concern that I was exposed to multiple individuals when they redressed me in a new gown. I questioned the need for complete nudity when I have had shoulder surgery, wrist surgery, eye surgery, an umbilical hernia repair, and 3 foot surgeries all while wearing my underwear at other facilities. I also provided an information sheet about the COVR garments and expressed my opinion that many patients would appreciate being covered so that any accidental intimate exposure could be prevented.
I will never know if my modesty and dignity were respected but I am encouraged by her response and thought I would share her response.
I would like to extend my sincere gratitude for the time you took to provide us with your feedback following your recent stay. Your kind words and constructive comments are greatly appreciated.
First and foremost, I am delighted to hear you had positive experiences with some of our outstanding nurses. It is always heartwarming to learn that our staff's dedication and compassionate care have made a significant impact. Rest assured, we will be recognizing these exceptional individuals for their hard work and commitment to excellence.
I also want to acknowledge and address your concerns regarding shared patient rooms and modesty during surgery.
We have a number of semi-private rooms to use our space efficiently. Sharing rooms allows us to accommodate patients and provide more bed availability. With semi-private rooms, our staff can more easily monitor and care for multiple patients and improve efficient care delivery. I recognize that this is not always optimal for our patients and hope to add additional private rooms in the future as we grow.
I did speak to the specific OR team that cared for you. Respecting out patient's privacy is very important to us as nurses, as we view all our patients as our family members and treat them as we would want our family to be treated. They understood that your privacy was very important to you, and they carefully guarded your privacy during the gown exchange and you were not exposed. In the procedure that you had, it is possible to have leakage during the case and so it is required to have patients in an OR gown.
Lastly, I would like to thank you for your recommendation regarding COVR medical garments.
We are always looking for ways to improve the patient experience, and we will certainly be looking into these garments to see how they might benefit our patients during their stay.
Once again, thank you for sharing your thoughts with us.
Your feedback helps us to continuously improve and provide the best possible care for all our patients.
If you have any further comments or suggestions, please do not hesitate to reach out.
Wishing you good health and happiness.
EM
Learn to read & get a damn education! I was being stmpatheic. I did not say it was hyperbolic? I said if you had an enema forced in you, I would not argue with "sodomize " as being inappropriate or hyperbolic teem!
That said, using the term "sofimize" so casually & fluppantly as tih & not qualifying it rely set yourself up. What the FUCK awee you saying dumbass? That these ladies had pricks, or put on dildos ? You leave that wide open, then get all sanctimonious with me when I ask "what happened?"
I'd give anything to finish this "discussion* with you in person! I'm in CA
This is an endemic issue here. With JR, Cat & now you. Putting things out of context as a means of getting aggressive with me. JR who gratuitously attacked me with no reason (other than her blind allegiance to Archie) shows great insight, compassion & understanding in patient rights issues, writes fairly well sone of the time, but then it gets discombobulated & out of context
On the other hand, Cat & you are like dumb articulate children so get "irritated about thi s! Flippantly bandying around sodomize then this shameless display of illiteracy has cost you all credibility. Fint openly attacked me again.
TC
"shut my mouth" huh?
TC
EM, I am glad that they did respond to you. A piece that I don't understand is that if you did not have any leakage, why would they need to change your gown? In saying that I assume they'd know based on whether the gown itself had gotten wet. If you did have leakage, it would seem that they'd have cleaned you in addition to changing the gown; something that cannot be done without exposing you, and in that case, the exposure would have been necessary.
Hello,
Most of us have expressed intimacy, dignity or modesty issues and our hoped-for remedies. There's no need for animosity or contention among us. Please, let's try to treat each other kindly and civilly.
Reginald
I agree
Biker,
I don't understand the "leakage" statement either. Most modern ESWL machines do not require you to lay in water, but utilize some type of a water filled bladder or pillow to help transmit the sound waves. When I moved to the table, it appeared that the machine would be placed in direct contact with my back and the table did not have any mechanism to hold liquid. I suppose it is possible that there might have been leakage of urine. The CEO might have said that simply to placate me. Unfortunately, my flank still hurts and a recent CT scan shows remaining non-obstructing bilateral stones that were not candidates for the ESWL so I may ask about the procedure when I next see the urologist. I would prefer to change myself out of a wet COVR garment if that was an option.
EM
Maybe..just maybe, part of the conflicts between patients and medical providers/medical systems is the two words EM wrote "don't understand". Could that be the pathology? And remember that the ignorance is sitting there on both sides..patients and providers. Now, the question I pose is: how can the individuals or groups or systems ON BOTH SIDES resolve this psychological conflict? Is that possible or is that conflict part of an inherent defect in understanding present within both sides? Do any of my reader participants have any comment about my pathology description and how it can be treated, lessened or resolved to all parties? Is UNDERSTANDING possible? ..Maurice.
EM I have some similar letters from the hospital where I had what where to me very disturbing and emotionaly damaging treatment. They thanked me for my input and would be using the information that I shared with them to review their progresses and use it for future training to provide patients with a better experience.
What I am certain of is they are doing things exactly the same. There is always another patient to follow after the last that is just as naïve and uninformed as I was.
Their motto is it is better to ask for pardon than permission it saves them time and money
Dr. B if am reading your question correctly the first thing that has to be understood is patient and provider are both of the same human race possessing the same strengths and weaknesses throughout the species. what creates the greatest difference between us is our environment.
Among the population of patients I have read them declare that they don’t care who sees them naked (I think among some especially men it’s a form of bravado to hide their real embarrassment) but the fact is in normal Societal settings, being naked typically is always sexual when it happens in mixed gender settings. Then you end up in a medical setting and everything you ever believed in gets turned upside down.
From the providers standpoint they may have started out with these same dignity concerns and embarrassment at walking in on a naked person of the opposite sex but these concerns are driven out of you by the environment you live in. Along with all you must learn part of that training is allowing yourself to become desensitized to nakedness. Reading some of the documentation that is out there for some “ professionals” that process isn’t always complete. In an effort to complete their task what they expose of a person’s body is just another day in the office even if the exposure is excessive never knowing or caring what life altering harm they have left in their wake . That is why honesty and transparency are critical and are woefully lacking and all medical professionals should be trained in trauma informed care
Jeff
Hello Dr. Bernstein,
Jeff has expressed the "pathology" rather well. I might add that the time element also plays a great part in the scenario. In a hospital (or ER) setting, patient and physician have little time for conversation to express each other's concerns. Medical personnel work almost automatically. There is little concern for altering their protocols. The patient is often just the object of their "operation". His or her personhood is barely recognized in deference to the task at hand. This hernia must be completed expeditiously to be able to attend to the next gall bladder. There's no slowing down. The facility's bottom line is at stake. Reversing these time constraints would be welcomed; however, there's little chance of this happening. Until then, we address the situation one "person" at a time.
Reginald
Reginald, et al: All I can tell you was for the many, many years I was teaching first and second year medical students my emphasis to the beginning (and also my on the scene observation) was to give the patient's requests and demands FULL attention and attempt to abide with them. The students attended to fully awake patients who demonstrated the patient"s understanding of the request the patient made.
That was about first and second year medical students. I had no control of what happened later in their medical school or later education and laying of hands and attention to the patient's medical condition. ..Maurice.
Hello Dr. Bernstein,
Most of us who have interacted with academia realize that what's learned is somewhat "idealized". Thus, we have the dichotomy between the university and the real world. This, of course, allows for the free exchange of ideas in the university and, the practical application of these ideas in business and industry. Unfortunately, what you taught your charges is compromised by profit motives and expediency. Medical personnel are stretched thin and patient relationships are compromised. The fifteen minutes allocated per office visit cannot possibly establish a working relationship. In the ER, no relationship is established at all. You did a great job instructing students.
Sadly, university training is sacrificed for revolving door efficiency.
Reginald
But what can the medical system do or MUST due to provide the patients their decision potential if they have their normal independent mental potential despite their physical symptoms to "be in charge" of what will or are in charge of what is happening to them medically or surgically or even extraneous to their medical status ? Patients are NEVER "objects". They must be considered "participants". ..Maurice.
Hello again Dr. Bernstein,
I believe that most of the posters on this blog would agree that patients are considered "participants" by medical personnel ONLY IF the patient agrees with medical protocols. Any proposed digression from established procedures is usually viewed as "uncooperative". A patient can "feel" in charge until anesthesia is administered. After being anesthetized, the patient's wishes are ignored and one becomes an object, with medical personnel completely in charge. This may not be a correct characterization in all cases; nevertheless, posters here have cited enough instances to suggest that the above might too often be what happens.
Reginald
There is a 34 minute long video on Youtube from Oct, 2013 titled “general anesthesia cardiac anesthesia. From the language I assume it is Japanese, they have a healthcare system on par with the "west". The patient climbs onto the OR table themself and at 0:52 a drape is placed over the gown. At 1:01 the gown is removed with the drape still mostly in place, the bovie pads are then attached to the hips. So far so good. At 6:48 pt gets some IV meds, at 9:11 the mask goes on and pt is "out" shortly after that. Again, so far so good. But….. at 12:36 the drape is lowered to the waist and at 12:59 its lowered down to around the knees. The pt is NOT covered up again AT ALL until 19:25 so a full six and a half minutes of being exposed to a room full of people.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ru9CnU_Dh4g
You can call me Chris.
Chris, I watched it, and while they did leave him exposed more than was necessary to do his catheter and shave his pubic area, they at least had a reason to expose him at that point in the process. It was after that initial procedure by his neck that they then left him exposed w/o any action being performed in the genital area.
All that said, the staff all seemed totally focused on doing their individual tasks. It didn't seem anyone was gawking at him.
Chris what that video proves is that once you have been sedated you lose your citizenship as part of the human race that still deserves every ounce of respect and dignity regardless of your conscious state. And you become an object not a person.
Doctor Bruce Levy an orthopedic surgeon saw the need for preservation for a patient’s dignity When anesthetized and created the Covr garment. Bless him for that! But my question is why are so many hospital systems unaware (so they say)of there existence and many totally reluctant to entertain their use ?
Jeff, much of the issue is definitional. For reasons that defy logic to many patients, it seems OR staff think that the patient being unaware of their being needlessly exposed means that the patient's dignity and privacy has still been respected. Even if conscious, it seems that healthcare staff think that so long as needlessly exposing a patient is more convenient for themselves, that it doesn't constitute needless exposure.
As an aside I had an appt. with my primary care PA yesterday. Though I was fully dressed, when someone knocked on the door (but did not enter), she then cracked open the door just enough for herself to slip out into the corridor to see whoever knocked. Literally that door was not opened an inch more than it had to be. She is vigilant when it comes to patient privacy.
Biker I just re read volume 122 that came up as one I had saved. I had saved it because after following this blog for many years it was the first time I had ever posted anything and I realized that over the years I had become acquainted with you and so many others that struggle with the same issues and have so much appreciated everyone’s input, insight, and support. I have come to think of all of you as friends! Or at least as birds of a feather flocking together. I haven’t given up the fight and I never will but I’m running into something that I don’t know if anyone else has or is experiencing? My cardiologist that I have been seeing for years is now ghosting me.after presenting a letter from my psychologist explaining the need for gender, concordant care for intimate procedures I have tried to make my routine follow up appointments that I have been doing for over 10 years. I am no longer receiving any responses to my request?
This struggle is not getting better or easier as we all watch the decline and collapse of the whole medical system that we operate under
Jeff, I wish I had an answer for you but medical practices have an endless supply of patients and can ghost any patient they deem problematic. Maybe others here have approaches that might work for you.
In case anyone would like to deny that female nurses do not judge male patient's penis/testicles, here's a link that Misty Roberts sent out: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1135364330537175/posts/1710665646340371/
Make sure you read and read because the comments never stop and the new names adding to the conversation all the time.
It is nice to know they make fun of older males who may have a medical condition that causes the penis to shrink or hide "turtling". I wonder if these same utterly disgraceful excuses for human garbage also make fun of women who have had their breast removed due to cancer or if their heinous comments are only for males? Many males who have had prostate removal or heart conditions may also have "turtling" but some get it with age. Making fun of a man's small penis shows the intelligence and humanity of these females are most likely even smaller. Are they still professional in carrying on in this manner? I say no because while they may not do it directly to the patient's face, patients can sense what many of these nurses are thinking. They also can read and find sites like this one which clearly shows these women are nothing but hateful hags.
I wish I hadn't read that Facebook post. That ramps my insecurities about being in the hospital to new highs.
EM
JR, I read the comments. It is very disheartening to see hundreds of nurses essentially mocking their male patients who are suffering the effects of obesity, prostate surgeries, or perhaps just their genetic roulette fate. No doubt they consider themselves professionals on account they try not to giggle in front of the patient. I can only imagine what their posts would be if the discussion was about the other end of the spectrum. I can also imagine their horror if male nurses did a thread mocking female mastectomy patients. I wonder if these female nurses would also mock testicular cancer patients
I suspect these same nurses, if they post on Quora, would say that they have never judged a patient, nor have they ever known another nurse to do so.
Hi JR. I is so good to hear from you and I hope you are well!
I tried to pull up that link that you posted but it said it was unavailable? But what you were describing is horrible treatment of a fellow human being and to think that disparaging remarks like that about something so personal to most people is unconscionable. Especially when it is coming from people that we are expected to put our complete faith in when we quite often allow ourselves to be completely under their control usually by drugs of their choosing.
I would really like to be able to see that site you referenced.
Please keep up the good work you and Cindy are doing on your podcast! I’m always anticipating your next episode.
Jeff, It is that time of year when my husband medical/sexual happened so we are suffering the recurring trauma. However, I wanted to post that URL again. I went to it and it worked.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/1135364330537175/posts/1710665646340371/ I think I will see abt talking about this with Cindy on one of our podcasts. I went through and took a lot of screen shots of the comments in case they took it down. I think the public needs to be aware this behavior does happen.
BTW, I had one nurse on Quora, he was a male nurse ER/paramedic is what he called himself said for me (us) to "get over it" if they violate bodily dignity by not shutting a door/curtain or unnecessary exposure in general. He also said to leave. So much for compassion.
I think these comments should teach us that although they may have on their "game" face, far too many of them are laughing. Some even said they had to run out of the room to laugh. Yes, although they do see genitals day in and day out, they are still something for them to be interested in as these posts prove. I have never bought the false narrative they do not have personal and/or sexual feelings. How would that work? They have personal lives. Is there a switch they click when they enter the building? No, there is not. We are told that so we will blindly follow their orders and their need to exert power and control over us because if we do not believe that, we ask questions and resist situations we do not want to be placed in thus making their job not as convenient and not feeding their need for total power and control.
Biker, I doubt those women do make fun of breast cancer survivors. Within the past 15 yrs or so, it has been through a political ideology to hate certain groups and one group where hate is targeted is towards men especially if they are older and white. I also believe they would make fun of testicular cancer survivors too or anything they would consider "abnormal" in an heterosexual male because they know they would most likely be reprimanded or fired if they made fun of certain groups. That is how our society is today. You can degrade certain groups but not others. While I realize not all medical providers do this, we certainly know far too many do and we have no way of knowing which type we will encounter and this makes it all the more scarier especially for those who have suffered this type of trauma.
Sorry I just posted but I realized it had somehow forgotten my ID.
JR, you misread one item in my last post. I know that female nurses wouldn't mock breast cancer mastectomy patients. I said they'd be horrified if male nurses ever did that. Of course male nurses would never do that as they know it would be career-ending. My point is that the sisterhood only deems male patients fair game to mock. I assume that yes they would mock testicular cancer survivors too.
Biker, I meant to put in there "too" as yes you did say that.
I have to make 2 comments.
1) I don't see anything wrong in the video from youtube. It's just a patient being operated on. Everyone is going about their business doing what they need to get done. So he's exposed for a while. I thought it was professional of them to wait until he was out to start getting him ready. They didn't with me when I had my appendix out. The sheet was off and people working on me the minute I hit the table. And I had an audience watching in the theater.
Even now I can rationalize the students wanting to see everything being done. They were going to be surgeons or operating nurses. I was a bit uncomfortable but because of the drug they gave me to help me relax, I didn't freak out.
2) I don't believe for a minute that most of those posts are from real nurses. It's social media. They can say and pretend to be whoever they want. I'm sure a few could be, but in reality it's most likely just from weird people getting kicks. You can't believe social media.
From my own painful experience, I don't think that any nurse intentionally abused me. Others on here have had a different experience. I get that. We all know that in every profession you're going to have bad apples. It's just life. But I still believe most of them are good people.
I also personally try and fit in, go with the flow. I understand I'm the 1 that has a phobia. Maybe the profession caused it, but it's still mine to deal with.
I don't tell my doctors, even my PCP, about my abuse. To me it's a red flag. That's kind of unfortunate, but it's a reality also. My PCP, when I told her about my uneasiness with some medical procedure I was about to have, told me to take a valium before going to the doctor.
As I get older and more doctors visits inevitable, it works for me. I even took 1 before my visit with my PCP and I was so glad I did. She examined me in front of her admin who was recording notes. The girl had a full view of my genitals. She never looked directly at them, but even if she did do I think she would somehow be turned on by an old man? She may look out of curiosity, but that's all.
I also know my PCP would have asked the girl to leave if I told her I was uncomfortable. But that would mean more work for her. I'm finding the more times I'm in these situations, the less freaked out I am. Almost like someone whose afraid of flying. Their fear eases the more they fly.
But I still take that valium. If I'm ever going to have something done where I can't take the valium, I will ask them to prescribe something for me to take before hand. Otherwise I might not show up.
I guess everyone has their own way of dealing with this. I find trying to fit in is much easier and less stressful. PTSD is a funky thing. So whatever works to try and manage it.
JR. Bigotry against white older males does exist. Bigotry exists against ANY group. I didn't recognize how really bad it was until 2016. I thought racism had been replaced by bigotry against ugly, slow, & poor. What has also always existed/exists is targeting the people who can't fight back.
Have you ever heard of the Willowbrook School scandal? It was a school for students who were mentally disabled. Opened in 1947 and closed in 1987. Parents of mentally disabled kids were told that the school was a really good option and their kids would be taken care of by professionals.It could be that it started out that way. The school was designed to house 4000 students. But there was a large waiting list of parents looking to enroll their kids there
Long story short. The state kept letting go of staff and not replacing them. The school took in 6000 instead of 4000 . Extreme neglect was the result. One doctor seeking to coordinate with the parents was fired for trying to coordinate and the person firing him forgot to ask for the key back so he called Geraldo Rivera and brought him into the school. Changes were made and Willowbrook shut down but nobody went to jail. Accountability is so important. Sorry for such a long post and kinda changing the subject a bit. JF
I have to make 2 comments.
1) I don't see anything wrong in the youtube film. It's a patient about to be operated on being prepped. They were actually kind enough to wait until he was out to remove the sheet and start work. When I had my appendectomy as soon as I was on the table the sheet was gone and they began working on me right away. And I had an audience watching.
The only reason it didn't freak me out was the drug they gave me to relax. Looking back I can understand the people watching. They were going to be surgeons or OR nurses themselves and as such would want to see everything, and I mean everything that happened.
I doubt anyone was excited to see my body. And if they were, oh well.
2) Although I didn't read the facebook post, I can only imagine. But that's social media. Just because they say their a nurse and post some ugly comment doesn't mean they really are. They could be anybody somehow trying to get some kind of kick. You can't believe social media.
I believe that most medical professionals are decent, good people that don't intend harm. I understand I have the phobia. The medical profession may have caused it, but it's mine to deal with. I also get others on here have had an experience where they feel they were harmed by people disregarding the rules. I'm sure there are some bad apples. It's just life.
I never tell my doctors I was traumatized. To me it's a red flag. Something they have to think about in this wacky sue everyone world. I find it much less stressful to mostly go along with the system. If my PCP wants to examine me in front of her admin, so be it. The valium I take before going for a medical appointment does what it's meant to do. Calms me so I don't freak out. I only wish I had found this solution years ago.
As I get older and require more medical care, I'm finding the more I'm placed in these situations the more accepting of it I'm becoming. Like someone with a flying phobia. It eases the more they fly. PTSD is a funky thing.
Brian I have tried to sift through some of your comments ? For someone who has PTSD and is able to be excepting of some of the situations you described means that you excepted the treatment you received as being absolutely necessary with no
Breach of dignity or modesty on their part. The fact that you were ok with a female scribe in the room while you were fully exposed was only eclipsed by the statement you made about her not looking at your genitals but if she had it would only have been out of CURIOSITY???? What gives a non medical licensed woman the right to observe a man’s genitals out of CURIOSITY???? This is where many of us have a problem! That is called voyeurism. What I’m struggling with is your apparent acceptance of this?
on their part
Brian, I don't see it as a function of whether the staff gets excited about seeing patient genitals but rather as the lack of respect in exposing patients needlessly, be it in terms of extent, duration, or audience.
As I go about my regular life, nobody in the general public seeks to remove my clothes or asks me to expose myself because there is not a valid reason for that to occur. Sometimes in healthcare there is not a valid reason for exposure, yet we're supposed to accept that it is OK because it is in a healthcare setting. Why?
Jeff/Biker, it doesn't give them any right. It's just human nature. And to be specific, I wasn't fully exposed. I was exposed where I needed to be for the exam. Just like I was exposed on the operating table. It was necessary.
I'm becoming accepting of it because they were just doing their job. There was no disrespect intended. And my own goal is to avoid being triggered so I'm not freaked out for a few days.
Brian, I have to disagree with a couple of points you made. As for the FB comments, I do believe most of them are medical people. Most of them have learned they cannot make those kind of remarks to the patients or sometimes in the facility where they can be overheard. Social media gives them the perfect place to blow off steam. Many of them talked about how they remained "professional" with the patient but some talked about how difficult it was to hard it together. Some mentioned they had to run out the door to laugh. AllNurses is another site where they let down their hair and have the same types of conversations. Mostly these are females talking about male patients as rarely do you see a male nurse talking abt a female patient. I do see some male nurses degrading male patients.
As far as them being "good, decent people that don't intend to harm" is a huge area that I disagree with you on. They know that unnecessary exposure is harmful both mentally and physically. They know this because they will seek to avoid it as a patient. However, they don't acknowledge they are harming you as a patient by their behavior which is another issue. It reminds me of the female nurse who for years was aware that unconsented for pelvic exams (rape) were being done on unsuspecting female patients so when it came her time for a procedure she thought she had made sure it wouldn't happen to her but it did. She is now on the news circuit against this but when it happened to others, she IMO turned a blind eye but when it happened to her, it was outrageous.
I also know that sometimes genital exposure is necessary but it is the manner in which it is done that makes the difference as in what Biker defined. While they might act like your genitals means nothing to them apparently that is not true according to many social media sites. It is human nature to be curious as we live in a media world that makes the selling of sex their number goal and medical people do not suddenly become asexual during their shift but once their shift is over become sexual again. This simply is not reasonable to believe although we have been sold this BS for years. The disrespect isn't if they medically need genital exposure for the specific treatment but rather how they go about it before, during, and afterwards. You may not ever know if you were truly disrespected because their game face may be different than their aftergame face. It is that unknown aspect that is also very triggering for many of us as many of us have suffered disrespect to our faces during the exposure time that we know or maybe fear the same is happening when we are conscious or when we leave. Medical people are no angels but they are normal people. When I first started doing remediation in elementary school, I was shocked at how other teachers would make fun of students. In my present life, I am shocked at how several mental health "professionals" that I know make fun of their patients. So yes, I know the same is happening whether we are aware of it or not when we are medical patients. After what happened to my husband, we are not just freaked out for a couple of days but we are now forever freaked out.
Dr. B. I published it again without ID. It was JR in the above post. This new way it is coming up is something I have gotten used to yet.
Yes, it is time to move on to Volume 131. No more comments will be
published on this Volume but please continue with thoughts and feelings and advice on the new volume. ..Maurice
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