The Ideal Allergy Treatment in 54 Words
THE IDEAL ALLERGY TREATMENT
I could not breathe. It called for desperate measures. My mother took me to get allergy shots. I asked the doctor if it would hurt. No, he said, and offered to be shot as well. So I did it. My breathing has greatly improved. I seem to have no allergies here in solitary confinement.
This 54 word short, short, short story was written last year by me and together with two family members one of whom has allergies. It is an example of what can be expressed in as little as 55 words (or LESS like my story above), a yearly challenge to its readers which the San Luis Obispo (California) New Times newspaper has been supporting for many years.
The idea is to create a whole story with a beginning, middle and ending punch line in just 55 words (or less). It is fun but not as easy as one might think to develop a story line leading to an unexpected conclusion is so few words. Words are separated by spaces and the number like 55 as written as a digit is one word. Hyphenated words are not counted as one word but contractions like "shouldn't" are one word. Abbreviations such as USA or DNR are considered one word. The title doesn't count in the 55 words but can't exceed 7 words.
How about my visitors contributing to this thread their own devised 55 word stories about medicine, diseases, doctors, nurses.. you got the idea!? It is all for fun.. no prizes. But make it interesting.. especially that ending. ..Maurice.
2 Comments:
Becoming overwhelmed with caring for patients.
The telemetry unit was busy, so much to do, so many patients. We were short staffed that day. I transferred one patient to the ICU. I gave my patients their breakfast, it was getting late I needed to get moving, medications, assessments, vital signs, paperwork, too much. I gave to wrong medications to two patients.
55 Words of fiction that could be reality for some.
Thanks Mike for writing us your story. Perhaps, your punch line is unfortunately too realistic. A more uplifting but unexpected punch line could be:
Then every patient chorused "Can we help you?"
Any more? ..Maurice.
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